Happy Valentine's day today fellas

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koonja

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Lol @ whiskey's post. So true. I may paraphrase that for a facebook post that's about to happen.
 

arrowryan

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zach-galifianakis-crying.gif


Should I just change my avatar to Alan? Lol
 
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Bogtrotter07

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My head feels bigger from all I have learned from you in this thread.

My daughter liked the batteries I remembered to get so the kids could use the walkie-talkies their grandma got them. I asked her why that was more remarkable than the candy or movie I got them. She said because it shows you think of us, and know what is important to us. A few bucks worth of 9v batteries! She is 10 going on like 30.
 

IrishLax

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Fake holiday. Don't let Hallmark, the diamond cartel, and candy companies force your hand on anything. Expressions of affection should be spontaneous, heartfelt, and unexpected (for maximum effect). Most "traditional" Valentine's Day gestures have been so thoroughly commoditized as to be meaningless.

If your significant other expects something today, you probably have to come through or deal with some disappointment/ anger. But going forward, I'd suggest doing this kind of stuff at random intervals. It will be much more appreciated, and you can finally stop caring about this contrived marketing bonanza.

I believe this to a letter... sadly, in my experience, it's impossible to shake. Awhile ago my girlfriend of a long time said "no gifts" for our anniversary. I was fine with this... especially because anniversaries when you AREN'T MARRIED make no sense to me. Where do you even set the date from? Was it the first time we hooked up? The first time I actually took her on a date? If the latter, what constitutes a date?

So our "anniversary" comes around and we go out to dinner an she gives me a watch. A nice, couple hundred dollar watch. Eff that noise. I didn't know whether to be pissed at her or super happy with the baller watch or what. But mainly... somehow, even though I did nothing wrong... I felt BEYOND guilty. So now I never, ever ask if we are doing gifts for anything and go outrageously far in the other direction. I will never be out-gifted and even give her gifts for obscure holidays. Like Groundhog Day.

I'm all in. Full on committed to commercialism. The funniest part of this sham? All of her female co-workers think I'm the greatest guy in the history of ever because all they know of me are the constant stream of gifts. The once yearly when I see them at holiday parties I am consistently referred to as "the nicest" and "the best" while she is called "the luckiest." What a crock.
 

arrowryan

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I believe this to a letter... sadly, in my experience, it's impossible to shake. Awhile ago my girlfriend of a long time said "no gifts" for our anniversary. I was fine with this... especially because anniversaries when you AREN'T MARRIED make no sense to me. Where do you even set the date from? Was it the first time we hooked up? The first time I actually took her on a date? If the latter, what constitutes a date?

So our "anniversary" comes around and we go out to dinner an she gives me a watch. A nice, couple hundred dollar watch. Eff that noise. I didn't know whether to be pissed at her or super happy with the baller watch or what. But mainly... somehow, even though I did nothing wrong... I felt BEYOND guilty. So now I never, ever ask if we are doing gifts for anything and go outrageously far in the other direction. I will never be out-gifted and even give her gifts for obscure holidays. Like Groundhog Day.

I'm all in. Full on committed to commercialism. The funniest part of this sham? All of her female co-workers think I'm the greatest guy in the history of ever because all they know of me are the constant stream of gifts. The once yearly when I see them at holiday parties I am consistently referred to as "the nicest" and "the best" while she is called "the luckiest." What a crock.

I think the anniversary date for a couple that is not married is the date you become "official" boyfriend and girlfriend. At least that is how us young guys do it these days
 
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Irish Houstonian

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I think the anniversary date for a couple that is not married is the date you become "official" boyfriend and girlfriend. At least that is he us young guys do it these days

^Yep. Most chicks have the "exclusivity" date in their head -- what they believe to be the date y'all became "exclusive". (Whether the particular date is correct or not...)
 

Emcee77

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I believe this to a letter... sadly, in my experience, it's impossible to shake. Awhile ago my girlfriend of a long time said "no gifts" for our anniversary. I was fine with this... especially because anniversaries when you AREN'T MARRIED make no sense to me. Where do you even set the date from? Was it the first time we hooked up? The first time I actually took her on a date? If the latter, what constitutes a date?

So our "anniversary" comes around and we go out to dinner an she gives me a watch. A nice, couple hundred dollar watch. Eff that noise. I didn't know whether to be pissed at her or super happy with the baller watch or what. But mainly... somehow, even though I did nothing wrong... I felt BEYOND guilty. So now I never, ever ask if we are doing gifts for anything and go outrageously far in the other direction. I will never be out-gifted and even give her gifts for obscure holidays. Like Groundhog Day.

I'm all in. Full on committed to commercialism. The funniest part of this sham? All of her female co-workers think I'm the greatest guy in the history of ever because all they know of me are the constant stream of gifts. The once yearly when I see them at holiday parties I am consistently referred to as "the nicest" and "the best" while she is called "the luckiest." What a crock.

OMG there is too much truth in this post for me to handle.

Anniversaries before marriage are necessarily arbitrary and dumb.

You CANNOT not get her a gift unless you are absolutely certain that she won't get you one. I've been burned before, but one thing that has worked for me is to get her to agree in advance that we will both spend the money we would have spent on gifts on an event we participate in together like a ski trip, dinner at the best restaurant in town as opposed to a merely nice one, great tickets to a concert or show as opposed to cheap seats, etc. That curbs her compulsion to buy something to commemorate the occasion.

And the truest truth of all: it's not really your girl that you have to please by giving in to the Valentine's Day/hallmark holiday commercialism, it's her friends and co-workers! Because that is all they are talking about all day today, what all their respective Valentine's plans are. I just wish girls didn't care what their friends think. I mean I don't care what you a-holes think, haha.

UGH it is annoying.
 

Whiskeyjack

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OMG there is too much truth in this thread for me to handle.

Srsly. Truth bombs left and right. If we keep this up, we'll solve world hunger before too long.

You CANNOT not get her a gift unless you are absolutely certain that she won't get you one. I've been burned before, but one thing that has worked for me is to get her to agree in advance that we will both spend the money we would have spent on gifts on an event we participate in together like a ski trip, dinner at the best restaurant in town as opposed to a merely nice one, great tickets to a concert or show as opposed to cheap seats, etc. That curbs her compulsion to buy something to commemorate the occasion.

Brilliant. I'll try to find a link for this, but research has shown that experiences are a far better investment than tangible goods for maximizing happiness. For instance, if you're going on a vacation, you get to anticipate it, enjoy it while you're there, and then reminisce on the memory forever after. And with the way human memory works, you idealize the trip a little more each time you remember it.

The joy you experience from acquiring something tangible is much shorter lived.

And the truest truth of all: it's not really your girl that you have to please by giving in to the Valentine's Day/hallmark holiday commercialism, it's her friends and co-workers! Because that is all they are talking about all day today, what all their respective Valentine's plans are. I just wish girls didn't care what their friends think. I mean I don't care what you a-holes think, haha.

Amen. Our culture still teaches women that success involves being put on a pedestal; that the more a man spends on you, the more valuable you are. Must be a hold over from the concept of women-as-chattel, but it's incredibly harmful.

I'm lucky in that my wife makes more money than I, so she views me more as a business partner than a sugar daddy. We're constantly working on the family budget and planning for the future, so there's not really any room for large mystery purchases.
 

BobD

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Now I know why some of you can spend more time on here than others. You're getting absolutely no pussy.
 

Walter White

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Had this discussion with my wife recently, and she agreed.

My next target: birthdays.

If you can't tell, I really hate it when our culture dictates that you must buy X for someone on Y date. If I want to you get you a gift, I'll do it whenever I damn well please. You won't be expecting it, so it'll mean much more to you. And no, I don't need a f*cking "Thank You" note afterward.

Bah-humbug
 

Booslum31

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Now I know why some of you can spend more time on here than others. You're getting absolutely no pussy.

My wife hates V-Day even more than I do. Thinks it's pathetic at her place of work how woman show-off their relationship when someone gets cookies on a stick. The rest of the year she only hears these same women bitching about the losers they married. She's come close to calling them out on it but always keeps it to herself.
We don't observe V-Day. But to your point...I already got some this morning and like my chances at the "two-fer" tonight.
 

Rack Em

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Srsly. Truth bombs left and right. If we keep this up, we'll solve world hunger before too long.

...

Must be a hold over from the concept of women-as-chattel, but it's incredibly harmful.

Back when men were men and sheep were afraid.
 

NDdomer2

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so i agree with if being a fake holiday and that it is better to do acts of love and kindness randomly. i do all those things and do them well. probably why she is still with me without poping the question for 7 years.

on the other hand if she wants spoiled a couple commercial days a year wtf she's worth it!
 

pkt77242

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My wife and I have been together for almost 10 years )6 of them married) and we have never bought each other a gift. We pick up a pizza watch a movie and enjoy some Ben & Jerry's and hopefully some bed sports.
 

BGIF

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Fake holiday. Don't let Hallmark, the diamond cartel, and candy companies force your hand on anything. Expressions of affection should be spontaneous, heartfelt, and unexpected (for maximum effect). Most "traditional" Valentine's Day gestures have been so thoroughly commoditized as to be meaningless.

If your significant other expects something today, you probably have to come through or deal with some disappointment/ anger. But going forward, I'd suggest doing this kind of stuff at random intervals. It will be much more appreciated, and you can finally stop caring about this contrived marketing bonanza.

Hear! Hear!

I've been this way for decades. My wife is special all year long and I try to acknowledge that throughout the year, usually on days Hallmark hasn't found yet. She likes a dozen roses but gets more joy from flowers I pick from our yard or wild ones.

Years ago a co-worker cattily mentioned to her that it was a shame that I didn't show my appreciation on Valentine's Day. She smiled and replied that her husband showed his affection all year long not on one contrived day.
 

BobD

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I think some of these posts are a bunch of bologna. Of course a gentleman should show love for his wife everyday, but that's no excuse to ignore a holiday set aside for it. It's only a commercial holiday if you make it one. Instead of buying something, make her something. Showing love is a positive thing.
 

NDdomer2

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I think some of these posts are a bunch of bologna. Of course a gentleman should show love for his wife everyday, but that's no excuse to ignore a holiday set aside for it. It's only a commercial holiday if you make it one. Instead of buying something, make her something. Showing love is a positive thing.

This. I took my girl bowling (her idea) then I found this exotic candy tasting at the local conservatory. It was part educational/info and part testing. They dimmed the lights and lit the walkways. Super simple and cheap but she loved it becaues I took the time to look something unique up. Is Valentines a real holiday probably not but without the conservatory would have never put the event on and we would have never went. I also had a box of chocloate covered strawberries sent to her office as a surprise. Got home at the end of the evening went home and made supper. Nothing special just a recipe I found online with some stuff we had at the house. Glass of wine and called it a night.
 
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