The Irish Envy Dad Thread

[Whiskeyjack]

Is Montessori legit or BS?

Legit, but unconventional. The prevailing educational model in America is very Prussian, which works great for most little girls, but can be a nightmare for energetic little boys. Most of the Montessori success stories I'm aware of look something like this: (1) young boy has chronic "behavioral" problems in public school; (2) administrators try to push Ritalin on the the kid to make him more manageable; (3) parents object and look for alternatives; (4) boy transfers to Montessori school and does much better since he can now move from station to station whenever his attention span runs out.

Based on what little you've shared about Grace here, it wouldn't be my first choice in your position. Check out the diocesan schools first. If their curriculum sucks or tuition is too high, look into a classical school instead.

 

[zelezo vlk]

Legit, but unconventional. The prevailing educational model in America is very Prussian, which works great for most little girls, but can be a nightmare for energetic little boys. Most of the Montessori success stories I'm aware of look something like this: (1) young boy has chronic "behavioral" problems in public school; (2) administrators try to push Ritalin on the the kid to make him more manageable; (3) parents object and look for alternatives; (4) boy transfers to Montessori school and does much better since he can now move from station to station whenever his attention span runs out.

Based on what little you've shared about Grace here, it wouldn't be my first choice in your position. Check out the diocesan schools first. If their curriculum sucks or tuition is too high, look into a classical school instead.

How much do we gotta donate to the Benedictines or Dominicans to just have a full time tutor? I'll go splitsies with you

 

[ShakeDown]

My wife is pregnant and it will be our first pregnancy . We are expecting identical triplets!!! This was natural by the way which is extremely rare they don’t really have statistics on it it’s so rare. Basically it’s about 1 in 200 million chance you can get natural identical triplets.

Anybody got any advice? Please I’ll need it

Congrats man!

I joined dad-dom December 13th. Baby girl is happy and healthy.

Introducing...Vayda Ray:

 

[NDGOLDEN]

Congrats man!

I joined dad-dom December 13th. Baby girl is happy and healthy.

Introducing...Vayda Ray:

Thank you. She’s adorable congrats! I’m hoping for boys idk if I could handle 3 girls haha 💰💰💰

 

[ACamp1900]

My wife is pregnant and it will be our first pregnancy . We are expecting identical triplets!!! This was natural by the way which is extremely rare they don’t really have statistics on it it’s so rare. Basically it’s about 1 in 200 million chance you can get natural identical triplets.

Anybody got any advice? Please I’ll need it

Wish I could help with advice and such... My assumption is it'll be hard(er) for the first year and then amazing as they start to grow up. Wish you all the best and if you have any general questions on kids I'm sure we will be more apt to help (I don't think anyone here has triplets).

 

[ACamp1900]

Thank you. She’s adorable congrats! I’m hoping for boys idk if I could handle 3 girls haha 💰💰💰

lol... I think 3 boys would be much harder...

 

[NDGOLDEN]

Wish I could help with advice and such... My assumption is it'll be hard(er) for the first year and then amazing as they start to grow up. Wish you all the best and if you have any general questions on kids I'm sure we will be more apt to help (I don't think anyone here has triplets).

lol... I think 3 boys would be much harder...

Thanks for some advice. It will be our first kids so we don’t know what it’s like to have kids which I personally think will help us cause if we had a singleton first then had triplets we would be terrified. Don’t get me wrong I’m terrified but I think it helps it’s our first.

Also I agree boys will be crazier but I want all 3 boys playing for ND haha

 

[ACamp1900]

Thanks for some advice. It will be our first kids so we don’t know what it’s like to have kids which I personally think will help us cause if we had a singleton first then had triplets we would be terrified. Don’t get me wrong I’m terrified but I think it helps it’s our first.

Also I agree boys will be crazier but I want all 3 boys playing for ND haha

okay, firm advice... pray for two girls and one boy. That way you get your boy to coach up but the two girls will keep your blood pressure down enough (in comparison to three hell raisers) so that you actually live to see him play competitively one day.

 

[NDGOLDEN]

okay, firm advice... pray for two girls and one boy. That way you get your boy to coach up but the two girls will keep your blood pressure down enough (in comparison to three hell raisers) so that you actually live to see him play competitively one day.

Their all identical so can only be one sex

 

[ACamp1900]

Their all identical so can only be one sex

Oh yes, I'm so caught up on this 'three boys' thing that I'm looking for any way around it.. lol

 

[bobbyok1]

My wife is pregnant and it will be our first pregnancy . We are expecting identical triplets!!! This was natural by the way which is extremely rare they don’t really have statistics on it it’s so rare. Basically it’s about 1 in 200 million chance you can get natural identical triplets.

Anybody got any advice? Please I’ll need it

NDGOLDEN, I cannot speak from firsthand experience, as few can, but I do have some good friends who had triplets via fertility treatments. I know the first year was hard for them to adjust, as it is for all parents with their first babies, but much more so in their case. My wife is pregnant with our third currently, and I know the first go round can be the scariest and a little more difficult due to simply learning the ropes.

From what little involvement I did have with the parents of the triplets I knew, the two things that stood out to me was:

1. Ask for help! Get as many people as you can to help you two. Don't be afraid to ask for help, and don't kid yourself thinking you can handle it. As parents of two boys my wife and I need help from time to time from family or friends. All the more in your case, especially for the first year. Sometimes you and the misses are going to need a "date night" for sanity sake, and to just relax.

2. Schedule, schedule, schedule. The most significant thing we have found in our time with our boys is keeping them on a regular schedule whenever possible. When we have not for whatever reasons, life is much harder for them, and for us as well. The couple we knew actually had a written out schedule/planner for their triplets, and followed it as best they could for their sake, their babies sake and for the sake of those they enlisted to help them.

I think like most things new to us, its tough at first, but once you find a rhythm and schedule it becomes easier, though not a cakewalk.

I have never been in your shoes in expecting 3 all at once But I have been a dad of 2 and soon 3 for going on 5 years now. I can say with all honesty, it is work, but the kind of work I would not trade for anything. My boys are totally worth ever ounce of work my wife and I put into them, and they bring me lots of joy for the work.

Praying for healthy pregnancy and delivery for your wife, for peace of mind and a game-plan for you both. And for the joy that comes with being a dad and having your own flesh and blood to follow in your steps. Peace brother

P.S. One resource suggestion I would make is the "Baby Wise" resources. My wife and I used them each of our boys and they were so helpful getting them into routines. Our boys both began sleeping through the night by 2 months. That is their claim to fame, that the 95% of kids will sleep through the night by 2 months if you follow their method. Everyone has their own cup of tea with these things, so obviously you all will have to find your fit. But I would highly recommend Baby Wise. Here is the first book for newborns.

https://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Bab...UTF8&qid=1518455496&sr=8-1&keywords=baby+wise

 

[NDGOLDEN]

NDGOLDEN, I cannot speak from firsthand experience, as few can, but I do have some good friends who had triplets via fertility treatments. I know the first year was hard for them to adjust, as it is for all parents with their first babies, but much more so in their case. My wife is pregnant with our third currently, and I know the first go round can be the scariest and a little more difficult due to simply learning the ropes.

From what little involvement I did have with the parents of the triplets I knew, the two things that stood out to me was:

1. Ask for help! Get as many people as you can to help you two. Don't be afraid to ask for help, and don't kid yourself thinking you can handle it. As parents of two boys my wife and I need help from time to time from family or friends. All the more in your case, especially for the first year. Sometimes you and the misses are going to need a "date night" for sanity sake, and to just relax.

2. Schedule, schedule, schedule. The most significant thing we have found in our time with our boys is keeping them on a regular schedule whenever possible. When we have not for whatever reasons, life is much harder for them, and for us as well. The couple we knew actually had a written out schedule/planner for their triplets, and followed it as best they could for their sake, their babies sake and for the sake of those they enlisted to help them.

I think like most things new to us, its tough at first, but once you find a rhythm and schedule it becomes easier, though not a cakewalk.

I have never been in your shoes in expecting 3 all at once But I have been a dad of 2 and soon 3 for going on 5 years now. I can say with all honesty, it is work, but the kind of work I would not trade for anything. My boys are totally worth ever ounce of work my wife and I put into them, and they bring me lots of joy for the work.

Praying for healthy pregnancy and delivery for your wife, for peace of mind and a game-plan for you both. And for the joy that comes with being a dad and having your own flesh and blood to follow in your steps. Peace brother

P.S. One resource suggestion I would make is the "Baby Wise" resources. My wife and I used them each of our boys and they were so helpful getting them into routines. Our boys both began sleeping through the night by 2 months. That is their claim to fame, that the 95% plus of kids will sleep through the night by 2 months if you follow their method. Everyone has their own cup of tea with these things, so obviously you all will have to find your fit. But I would highly recommend Baby Wise. Here is the first book for newborns.

https://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Bab...UTF8&qid=1518455496&sr=8-1&keywords=baby+wise

Thank you for all your advice. Her parents live only 2 miles down the road from us so that will be a big help and my parents are only 45 mins away tho my mom said she is gonna move her for the first year(I think she was joking). That will be a huge help and we will need it for sure.

And I have a lot of people saying that you have to get them on same schedule even if you have to wake up the other 2 it will be worth it in the long run.

Unfortunately they will be premes so they told us most triplets last about 32 weeks so in that case they would have to be in NICU for about a month or so.

Thank you for your prayers for a healthy pregnancy. Luckily my wife is 27 and is in very good health and the doctors said we are the best case scenario for a healthy pregnancy since my wife is healthy as a horse.

I think we have bought like 5 books already but I will look at that one too. Thanks for the advice again

 

[NDGOLDEN]

Oh yes, I'm so caught up on this 'three boys' thing that I'm looking for any way around it.. lol

Haha well it’s either three boys or three girls I still can’t decided which would be crazier. But personally I want 3 boys

 

[wizards8507]

Based on what little you've shared about Grace here, it wouldn't be my first choice in your position. Check out the diocesan schools first. If their curriculum sucks or tuition is too high, look into a classical school instead.

Our diocesan schools are solid for Kindergarten through high school, but the preschool teachers are pretty awful. We're visiting a traditional nursery school tomorrow night and it's kind of our only hope at this point. The vast majority of preschools in the area double as daycares, and the rates they charge for partial-day students are outrageous.

 

[Whiskeyjack]

Our diocesan schools are solid for Kindergarten through high school, but the preschool teachers are pretty awful. We're visiting a traditional nursery school tomorrow night and it's kind of our only hope at this point. The vast majority of preschools in the area double as daycares, and the rates they charge for partial-day students are outrageous.

Suffered through that as well. At one point, our oldest was in kindergarten while the younger 3 were all in pre-school/ daycare. We were paying through the nose to have strangers raise our kids, and it was miserable. Fortunately we were able to lure away an outstanding pre-school teacher to come nanny for us. Actually ended up saving us money, and our kids are getting vastly superior care in the comfort of our own home. But the savings was only possible due to how many kids I have, and we got really lucky finding the right person at the right time.

Good luck, wiz.

 

[zelezo vlk]

Suffered through that as well. At one point, our oldest was in kindergarten while the younger 3 were all in pre-school/ daycare. We were paying through the nose to have strangers raise our kids, and it was miserable. Fortunately we were able to lure away an outstanding pre-school teacher to come nanny for us. Actually ended up saving us money, and our kids are getting vastly superior care in the comfort of our own home. But the savings was only possible due to how many kids I have, and we got really lucky finding the right person at the right time.

Good luck, wiz.

Real talk, was there not a co-op or something y'all could've used with Catholic SAHMs or something?

 

[Whiskeyjack]

Real talk, was there not a co-op or something y'all could've used with Catholic SAHMs or something?

I wish. That sort of community support is really thin on the ground out here. I'm working on building stuff like that, but progress is slow.

 

[zelezo vlk]

I wish. That sort of community support is really thin on the ground out here. I'm working on building stuff like that, but progress is slow.

Well I'm glad to hear that you're building that support then

 

[ulukinatme]

My wife is pregnant and it will be our first pregnancy . We are expecting identical triplets!!! This was natural by the way which is extremely rare they don’t really have statistics on it it’s so rare. Basically it’s about 1 in 200 million chance you can get natural identical triplets.

Anybody got any advice? Please I’ll need it

lol... I think 3 boys would be much harder...

Thanks for some advice. It will be our first kids so we don’t know what it’s like to have kids which I personally think will help us cause if we had a singleton first then had triplets we would be terrified. Don’t get me wrong I’m terrified but I think it helps it’s our first.

Also I agree boys will be crazier but I want all 3 boys playing for ND haha

First, congrats! My sister is about to have twin boys (Remington and Jameson, yeah, they're a little redneck), and I can't imagine triplets. The logistics...oy! Definitely reach out for help, because you're looking at 3 of everything and that's asking a lot of any parent.

That said, I would take 3 boys over 3 girls any day of the week. Yeah, the boys could be rambunctious and cause some trouble, but girls can be drama (C'mon, ACamp, you should know this!) and drama x 3 sounds like a headache. Not to mention I worry far more for my daughter than I do for my sons. You don't worry about sons being jumped , you worry more about daughters because they're typically more vulnerable. Women are more likely to be taken advantage of. I wouldn't trade my daughter for anything, but if there's a choice and we're talking sanity and less worry, give me the boys.

 

[ulukinatme]

Congrats man!

I joined dad-dom December 13th. Baby girl is happy and healthy.

Introducing...Vayda Ray:

Congrats, homie! Reps, she's just stinkin' cute!

 

[ACamp1900]

That said, I would take 3 boys over 3 girls any day of the week. Yeah, the boys could be rambunctious and cause some trouble, but girls can be drama (C'mon, ACamp, you should know this!) and drama x 3 sounds like a headache. Not to mention I worry far more for my daughter than I do for my sons. You don't worry about sons being jumped , you worry more about daughters because they're typically more vulnerable. Women are more likely to be taken advantage of. I wouldn't trade my daughter for anything, but if there's a choice and we're talking sanity and less worry, give me the boys.

Man I completely disagree... I'm the only one of my friends that doesn't have a boy and they all pull their hair out constantly, the energy levels, the destructive nature, how much harder they are to discipline and control and such. My girls are really not that much drama, like at all... I'd love to have another girl. I do get the whole 'worry about their safety' thing though, that's real.

 

[NDGOLDEN]

First, congrats! My sister is about to have twin boys (Remington and Jameson, yeah, they're a little redneck), and I can't imagine triplets. The logistics...oy! Definitely reach out for help, because you're looking at 3 of everything and that's asking a lot of any parent.

That said, I would take 3 boys over 3 girls any day of the week. Yeah, the boys could be rambunctious and cause some trouble, but girls can be drama (C'mon, ACamp, you should know this!) and drama x 3 sounds like a headache. Not to mention I worry far more for my daughter than I do for my sons. You don't worry about sons being jumped , you worry more about daughters because they're typically more vulnerable. Women are more likely to be taken advantage of. I wouldn't trade my daughter for anything, but if there's a choice and we're talking sanity and less worry, give me the boys.

Haha I agree I would worry so much if I end up having girls. I’m already a worrier so with 3 girls especially once they become teenagers I’ll be anxious all day.

3 boys ya they will be crazy. Especially since I know I was a crazy kid. I was extremely high energy. I had to have surgery when I was 6 and they had to do an mri and being 6 it’s hard staying still for an hour so they tried to put me on adult sleeping medicine and it didnt even work so imagining 3 of those kids it will be wild BUT with 3 of them they will just play with each other and won’t be bothering us that much so

 

[NDinL.A.]

Golden, I have a friend who has triplets (boys). I believe they are nine now. Send me a PM, and I can get him in contact with you if you want. He's a good guy and he obviously has loads of experience.

 

[goldandblue]

My advice would be for you and your wife to not forget each other. Having 3 babies is going to throw a lot at both of you. You will find that your abilities to have compassion, patience, affection, intimacy with and for each other will all be affected.

Change your expectations of what normal is for you guys. Don't allow resentment to build between you. Know that the hot, spontaneous sex is all but over but know that is not because she doesn't love you or isn't attracted to you. These 3 babies are going to take alot out of her and there won't be much left for you at the end of the day.

Don't worry... Make it through the "muck" and things will improve. When we had our children all sorts of people gave us great advice. None of them talked about what having kids would mean to US in our marriage. How it would change things. How it is easy to perceive those changes as a lack of passion or love from each other. Fight through it together and COMMUNICATE!

Good luck. You have a tough but amazing road ahead of you.

 

[NDGOLDEN]

My advice would be for you and your wife to not forget each other. Having 3 babies is going to throw a lot at both of you. You will find that your abilities to have compassion, patience, affection, intimacy with and for each other will all be affected.

Change your expectations of what normal is for you guys. Don't allow resentment to build between you. Know that the hot, spontaneous sex is all but over but know that is not because she doesn't love you or isn't attracted to you. These 3 babies are going to take alot out of her and there won't be much left for you at the end of the day.

Don't worry... Make it through the "muck" and things will improve. When we had our children all sorts of people gave us great advice. None of them talked about what having kids would mean to US in our marriage. How it would change things. How it is easy to perceive those changes as a lack of passion or love from each other. Fight through it together and COMMUNICATE!

Good luck. You have a tough but amazing road ahead of you.

That’s really good advice thank you for that. I agree communication is very big. And yes we are very excited for our journey

 

[Bishop2b5]

My six year old daughter and I constantly "argue & fight" about which of us is the cutest. The more outrageous my threats & meltdowns over her claims & insults, the funnier it is to her. A few weeks ago we were getting ready to go out to dinner. My daughter was in the den putting her shoes on and I stepped out of the bedroom, pointed to myself all dressed up and told her I was definitely going to be the cutest that night. She laughed and told me no way and I said, "Don't make me come in there and beat you." She replied, "I'll kick your ass!" Whoa!

My wife & I both were like, "What the heck??? You can't say that!" She said that all the kids at school said it all the time and she didn't know it was wrong. She was embarrassed, but it was sorta funny. My wife told me, "Well, you've been warned. Don't be surprised when she starts beating you if you don't get her a puppy."

 

[ulukinatme]

Haha, good stuff!

When our youngest started talking he let something rip. He said something that sounded like...well....here.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/uLthfZ31v44" frameborder="0" allow="autoplay; encrypted-media" allowfullscreen></iframe>

 

[Bishop2b5]

My 6-year-old daughter is hilarious. Sometimes, though, her sense of humor isn't on speaking terms with any boundaries or common sense.

I called her from work last night to tell her goodnight and ask her about her day. She said my wife had yelled at her. When I asked why, she said, "You don't want to know" (not a good sign). I assured her that I did and she said it was for doing something inappropriate.

She finally confessed that after going to the bathroom, she'd decided to stuff toilet tissue in her butt crack and leave a few strands hanging down to make a horse tail, then stepped into the hallway and shook her naked butt and "tail" at her mom. She said, "I told you it was inappropriate."

 

[ulukinatme]

My 6-year-old daughter is hilarious. Sometimes, though, her sense of humor isn't on speaking terms with any boundaries or common sense.

I called her from work last night to tell her goodnight and ask her about her day. She said my wife had yelled at her. When I asked why, she said, "You don't want to know" (not a good sign). I assured her that I did and she said it was for doing something inappropriate.

She finally confessed that after going to the bathroom, she'd decided to stuff toilet tissue in her butt crack and leave a few strands hanging down to make a horse tail, then stepped into the hallway and shook her naked butt and "tail" at her mom. She said, "I told you it was inappropriate."

Ha! Great story.

My four year old has taken to pretending he's a cat from time to time. He meows, purrs, etc. We were joking around with him the other day, and I said "You stink! You smell like kitty litter." He tried to come up with a come back, and so he said "You smell like..." sniff sniff "Like....BACON!" We started dying laughing. He could have come up with any number of things that smelled worse, but that was the first one that popped into his head and he loves bacon. The best part was the more we laughed, the funnier it got because he kept repeating "It not funny, guys!" That just made it worse.

 

[Irish#1]

My 6-year-old daughter is hilarious. Sometimes, though, her sense of humor isn't on speaking terms with any boundaries or common sense.

I called her from work last night to tell her goodnight and ask her about her day. She said my wife had yelled at her. When I asked why, she said, "You don't want to know" (not a good sign). I assured her that I did and she said it was for doing something inappropriate.

She finally confessed that after going to the bathroom, she'd decided to stuff toilet tissue in her butt crack and leave a few strands hanging down to make a horse tail, then stepped into the hallway and shook her naked butt and "tail" at her mom. She said, "I told you it was inappropriate."

Ha! Great story.

My four year old has taken to pretending he's a cat from time to time. He meows, purrs, etc. We were joking around with him the other day, and I said "You stink! You smell like kitty litter." He tried to come up with a come back, and so he said "You smell like..." sniff sniff "Like....BACON!" We started dying laughing. He could have come up with any number of things that smelled worse, but that was the first one that popped into his head and he loves bacon. The best part was the more we laughed, the funnier it got because he kept repeating "It not funny, guys!" That just made it worse.

As Art Linkletter said, "Kids say the darndest things."