Takes some commitment to the bit to spread the donations around to multiple family members.
Ken Paxton could not be an uglier man. He looks like if Leatherface from Texas Chainsaw Massacre got fat. Seriously, if the guy got into shape he could reprise the role in a reboot without doing any hair or makeup.
No wonder he had to steal that other lawyer's pen. I wouldn't share mine either if the guy sitting across from me looked like he was trying to cover up his leprosy. I'd be terrified of catching what afflicts his face.
His wife left him under "biblical grounds" for committing "adultery" in their marriage. It took me a while to put together the fact that the "biblical grounds" she was referring to was an homage to Jesus cleansing lepers as noted in the Gospels... Ken obviously misread the Gospels and instead decided he was going to bang the leper, and caught something nasty.
Paxton makes Mads Mikkelsen's Le Chiffre in Casino Royale look like Ryan Gosling in The Notebook... Talarico might be a vegan and that's definitely going to turn some Texans off, but Paxton legitimately looks like he eats humans and is suffering the side effects. Fuck, I'd take Soy Boy.