All Things Star Wars Thread (Spoilers)

ShamrockOnHelmet

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It starts with stolen plans (a map) being entrusted to a droid.

Bad guy shows up and captures the first main protagonist that we meet.

Torture ensues.

Protagonist escapes with the help of another protagonist.

Main protagonist has a mysterious past, but somehow has powers that she must learn about.

Bad guy is motivated by a mysterious internal struggle.

Bad guy is trained by a mysterious overlord of some sort, whom we only see via hologram message.

Bad guys have a super weapon, which is a giant laser that blows up planets.

Super weapon has a weakness that is exploited, causing its destruction.

Main protagonist leaves at the end of the film to seek out a mentor, potentially for training.

C'mon man. That's point-for-point, basically, just with new window dressing and bigger weapons. The only difference is that Kylo Ren isn't an established badass the way Vader was, and that Rey doesn't meet a true mentor figure.

Otherwise, that is literally the entire plot of "A New Hope," and not just in the sense that "all movies with good guys versus bad guys will share similar traits."

Pretend you aren’t talking about about Star Wars, and go back through your bullet points. You literally just summarized a thousand movies with ~90% accuracy. Get out of here with that. They are two very different movies with similar notes. Just because butthurt fanboys keep saying it’s the same movie over and over doesn’t make it true.
 
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IrishLion

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Pretend you aren’t talking about about Star Wars, and go back through your bullet points. You literally just summarized a thousand movies with ~90% accuracy. Get out of here with that. They are two very different movies with similar notes. Just because butthurt fanboys keep saying it’s the same movie over and over doesn’t make it true.

I'm the opposite of a butthurt fanboy. I loved TFA.

But that doesn't mean it wasn't a window-dressed version of "A New Hope." And that's not a bad thing! I just hope "The Last Jedi" distances itself from the whole "rehash" thing.

It sounds like you might be the butthurt one... because people don't note TFA for being "original" enough lol.

And if a thousand movies feature an opening that has a droid receiving secret plans, followed by the protagonist that gave the droid the plans being tortured, followed by an escape, followed by a plot that features a star-destroying space station being blown to bits because of a vulnerability, and then the main protagonist leaves at the end on a spaceship to seek training....
 

ACamp1900

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All SW movies have the same feel or similar notes... that's obviously what makes them SW films... but NH and TFA were largely the same freakin movie.... it doesn't take a fanboy to see it, it takes one to deny it.
 

IrishLion

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Also of note:

Trolls are spoiling the end of TLJ every time Mark Hammill tweets.

Might be time to go dark on social media.
 

IrishLion

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All SW movies have the same feel or similar notes... but NH and TFA were basically the same freakin movie... it doesn't take a fanboy to see it, it takes one to deny it.

giphy.gif
 

ACamp1900

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Also of note:

Trolls are spoiling the end of TLJ every time Mark Hammill tweets.

Might be time to go dark on social media.

Not asking for details of the movie but what you are saying is: Hamill tweets something and people who know the ending just tweet spoilers back? Or people are getting Hamill riled up and he's tweeting the spoilers or something else? Just interested...
 

IrishLion

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Not asking for details of the movie but what you are saying is: Hamill tweets something and people who know the ending just tweet spoilers back? Or people are getting Hamill riled up and he's tweeting the spoilers or something else? Just interested...

Hamill will tweet anything at all, and if you open the tweet, trolls are posting spoilers in the replies. I haven't seen any myself, but I have read that it is happening.

He's talking about how he's blocking them all, but I am now officially refusing to open any tweets or Facebook comment sections until after I see the movie Thursday night.

Assholes did the same thing with TFA... there was a guy driving around with a giant rear window decal of the big spoiler for that one, and no Facebook comment section was safe. I saw TFA spoilers on news story comment sections.
 
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ACamp1900

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I wonder if they are real spoilers... also, how unloved does one have to feel to go out of their way ( dude driving around example) to pull that...
 

IrishLion

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I wonder if they are real spoilers... also, how unloved does one have to feel to go out of their way ( dude driving around example) to pull that...

They have to be real if Hamill is blocking them and deleting tweets about it.

Also: so unloved. The most unloved. All of the unloved.
 

ShamrockOnHelmet

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All SW movies have the same feel or similar notes... that's obviously what makes them SW films... but NH and TFA were largely the same freakin movie.... it doesn't take a fanboy to see it, it takes one to deny it.

Lol. The sky is blue on my planet, brother.
 

RDU Irish

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Seeing how ESB is the best movie - I don't mind if they rehash it in the same way y'all say TFA was NH rehash. I saw plenty of differences and lay a lot of the similarities on there needing to be some common thread to fulfill the need for fate to bring all of these people together in an enormous universe.

Laid down the law this AM - no spoilers from the rug rats or I disown them.
 

wizards8507

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<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/9HsIrTS1jq0" frameborder="0" gesture="media" allow="encrypted-media" allowfullscreen></iframe>

This makes me very, very nervous.
 

IrishLion

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This is spoiler-free, right?

EDIT: Saw the extended title. Nvm.
 

wizards8507

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Just saw that the film apparently has some "overt social and political commentary."

Even more nervous.

Film Review: Star Wars: The Last Jedi Moves Fast, Takes Risks, and Gets Political

Believe it or not, but The Last Jedi might be the most politically charged entry in the long-standing saga. Whether he’s lambasting the military industrial complex or biting his thumb at the one-percenters, Johnson never spares a moment to weld in some kind of choice commentary. Much of this is funneled into the narrative of Kelly Marie Tran’s new hero, Rose Tico, but really, his most powerful political sentiments are at the expense of our most sacred heroes. In a ballsy move, Johnson seemingly force chokes the entire baby-boomer generation for their past sins, namely how they’ve betrayed their morals and affected future generations in the long run. It’s a risky move that may piss off the more puritanical fan, but one that gives an unbelivably dark weight to the story.
 
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<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/9HsIrTS1jq0" frameborder="0" gesture="media" allow="encrypted-media" allowfullscreen></iframe>

This makes me very, very nervous.

Very cool, very cool.

Why would any of that make you nervous? They both clearly loved the movie. If the biggest issue is that there a few jokes that work but are unnecessary this will be a home run.
 

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Just saw that the film apparently has some "overt social and political commentary."

Even more nervous.

Weren't you defending the prequels 10 minutes ago? Rian Johnson could film 2.5 hours of him sitting constipated on the toilet and it would be better than the prequels.
 

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It's a shame Hollywood can't make a movie simply for peoples enjoyment anymore.
I wonder how "overt" it is.....

maxresdefault-1481315060.jpg

Silliness. If you're looking for political commentary you're going to find it. If ESB was released tomorrow how quickly do you think the emperor would be compared to Trump?
 

wizards8507

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Silliness. If you're looking for political commentary you're going to find it. If ESB was released tomorrow how quickly do you think the emperor would be compared to Trump?
Sinjir stoops and kisses him. His long-fingered hands pull the other man's scruffy face into his own. The moment lasts forever.

And it still doesn't last long enough. Because now here's Han, and he's got a hand on Sinjir's shoulder--

"We're not done yet, remember?"

Sinjir remembers. He stares deep into Conder's eyes. "I'm going to get you free. I know you're hurt. But we need your help. Can you slice?"

"With you by my side, I can do anything."

- Aftermath: Empire's End
 

gkIrish

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<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/9HsIrTS1jq0" frameborder="0" gesture="media" allow="encrypted-media" allowfullscreen></iframe>

This makes me very, very nervous.

Yeah that makes me nervous too. All the positives seemed to stem from actors' performances rather than the plot. And I am not sure why they would insist that the movie deserves a second viewing.

I'm excited Poe has a bigger role.
 

irishnd31

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Sinjir stoops and kisses him. His long-fingered hands pull the other man's scruffy face into his own. The moment lasts forever.

And it still doesn't last long enough. Because now here's Han, and he's got a hand on Sinjir's shoulder--

"We're not done yet, remember?"

Sinjir remembers. He stares deep into Conder's eyes. "I'm going to get you free. I know you're hurt. But we need your help. Can you slice?"

"With you by my side, I can do anything."

- Aftermath: Empire's End

tumblr_mtp62wUutg1sd5qb4o1_500.gif
 

GATTACA!

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Yeah that makes me nervous too. All the positives seemed to stem from actors' performances rather than the plot. And I am not sure why they would insist that the movie deserves a second viewing.

I'm excited Poe has a bigger role.

It's a spoiler free review. There's a reason they aren't talking about the plot.
 

GATTACA!

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Sinjir stoops and kisses him. His long-fingered hands pull the other man's scruffy face into his own. The moment lasts forever.

And it still doesn't last long enough. Because now here's Han, and he's got a hand on Sinjir's shoulder--

"We're not done yet, remember?"

Sinjir remembers. He stares deep into Conder's eyes. "I'm going to get you free. I know you're hurt. But we need your help. Can you slice?"

"With you by my side, I can do anything."

- Aftermath: Empire's End

GAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!

The only intimacy I want in my Star Wars is incest like the originals!

For real though you read trashy EU pulp and then are surprised when it sucks?
 

wizards8507

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GAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!

The only intimacy I want in my Star Wars is incest like the originals!

For real though you read trashy EU pulp and then are surprised when it sucks?
I'm a canon junkie. I need to see the Battle of Jakku retold from a minimum of three different perspectives. I need to know that Hux' first name is Armitage. For the most part, the new canon novels are actually really really good. But yeah, the Aftermath trilogy has some ham-fisted LGBT subplots. There's even an "interlude" chapter with a gender-neutral space pirate who goes by the pronouns "zhe" and "zher."
 

wizards8507

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DO NOT read the Variety review. It's spoilery AF. I avoided most of it but had one thing (that I already suspected) confirmed.

Spoilers: Yoda is back.
 

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I'm a canon junkie. I need to see the Battle of Jakku retold from a minimum of three different perspectives. I need to know that Hux' first name is Armitage. For the most part, the new canon novels are actually really really good. But yeah, the Aftermath trilogy has some ham-fisted LGBT subplots. There's even an "interlude" chapter with a gender-neutral space pirate who goes by the pronouns "zhe" and "zher."

Yeah I know. It was touching and empowering you cis gendered shitlord.
 

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DO NOT read the Variety review. It's spoilery AF. I avoided most of it but had one thing (that I already suspected) confirmed.

Omg I knew this was going to be the dark chapter of this trilogy but they really show him doing that with a porg? How graphic does it get? Another review I was reading said the slapping sound was the most disturbing part.
 
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