Wives and the Stupid **** They Say/Do

GowerND11

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My wife is like 25 percent Irish,… so she’s dumb roughly a quarter of the time.

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INLaw

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When it comes to female musical tastes.
My one time only tried and tested and proven to be true method.
Got my daughter to start guitar lessons while she was in her boys drool and girls rule stage. When I caught her listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn on her own I knew my test was a success.

Overly auto tuned music doesn't exactly inspire the next generation of guitarists.






Caution independent testing is still required your results may vary. Introduction to guitar lessons may lead to unwanted results.
Unwanted results would include overly loud caterwauling drifting from her room.
Overly loud caterwauling to be defined as but not limited to "musical acts" such as Kesha, Backstreet Boys, Nsync, or current "rock" acts who have a guitarist that plays one riff and use auto tune.

Possible side effects could also include the above defined overly loud caterwauling with the twist of a dieing cat singing along at full volume during her first heart break.

Said first heart break could cause issues in your relationship with your daughter when your first response is asking questions such as
"What happened?"
"Why is she killing a cat?"
"Is she possessed? Should I call the Priest?"
Or when you make statements such as
"It will be ok"
"I never liked him anyways"
"I'll take care of him"

It may also cause problems in your marriage.
The above questions and statements, but also including
"I want to be there for her, but first I need to go to the hospital and get my bleeding ears checked."
"It's just a high school relationship who cares?"
Or
"Seriously she'll forget about him in less than a year"
will lead to declarations such as
"Dad you just don't understand"
"Your a guy you wouldn't understand"
"You have no emotions"
This technique worked for me x2
 

Greenore

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As hard I as I have tried over the past 30 years, my wife (and girls) seem to hate the following bands:

RUSH
YES
Jethro Tull
Pink Floyd ("I hate that guy"... LOL)

One pleasant surprise was their reaction to Deep Purple. I think "Hush" really impressed them all.

I'm still working on it but I'm not too hopeful.

Cheers and Go Irish!!
 

INLaw

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As hard I as I have tried over the past 30 years, my wife (and girls) seem to hate the following bands:

RUSH
YES
Jethro Tull
Pink Floyd ("I hate that guy"... LOL)

One pleasant surprise was their reaction to Deep Purple. I think "Hush" really impressed them all.

I'm still working on it but I'm not too hopeful.

Cheers and Go Irish!!
Godspeed
 

Bishop2b5

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A proud father/daughter moment: I had my oldest daughter listening to classic rock on the way home from the hospital after being born. By the time she was 5 we were routinely playing "Name That Artist" and I'd teach her what to listen for, how to recognize various singers and guitarists, and so on. When she was 6, she heard Stevie Ray for the first time and I asked her if she knew who it was. She listened, looked puzzled, listened some more and said, "I'm not sure. It sorta sounds like a cross between Eric Clapton and Jimi Hendrix." I still get teary-eyed just thinking about it. :)
 

Greenore

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A proud father/daughter moment: I had my oldest daughter listening to classic rock on the way home from the hospital after being born. By the time she was 5 we were routinely playing "Name That Artist" and I'd teach her what to listen for, how to recognize various singers and guitarists, and so on. When she was 6, she heard Stevie Ray for the first time and I asked her if she knew who it was. She listened, looked puzzled, listened some more and said, "I'm not sure. It sorta sounds like a cross between Eric Clapton and Jimi Hendrix." I still get teary-eyed just thinking about it. :)

Next level parenting Bish!!
 

Irish#1

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A proud father/daughter moment: I had my oldest daughter listening to classic rock on the way home from the hospital after being born. By the time she was 5 we were routinely playing "Name That Artist" and I'd teach her what to listen for, how to recognize various singers and guitarists, and so on. When she was 6, she heard Stevie Ray for the first time and I asked her if she knew who it was. She listened, looked puzzled, listened some more and said, "I'm not sure. It sorta sounds like a cross between Eric Clapton and Jimi Hendrix." I still get teary-eyed just thinking about it. :)
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ACamp1900

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So y’all may not even know this but it’s widely known among Asians that Filipinos love corn beef hash and spam. It was delivered to them by American GIs during the liberation… and it’s true. They just have it in their culture that those two things are the universally loved horrible food items. To this day that culture tends to love slices of fried canned spam and corned beef hash. So that’s your history here.

My wife and I are trying to get in a bit better shape for a Mexico trip in a couple months and I offer to make her and I a veggie omelet and a smoothie for breakfast,… ‘that’s sound good!’ She says,… then after a moment,…. ‘but I bought a can of corn beef hash and spam yesterday and that sounds even better’- things Filipino wives say even when they’re ‘dieting’
 
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GATTACA!

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So y’all may not even know this but it’s widely known among Asians that Filipinos love corn beef hash and spam. It was delivered to them by American GIs during the liberation… and it’s true. They just have it in their culture that those two things are the universally loved horrible food items. To this day that culture tends to love slices of fried canned spam and corned beef hash. So that’s your history here.

My wife and I are trying to get in a bit better shape for a Mexico trip in a couple months and I offer to make her and I a veggie omelet and a smoothie for breakfast,… ‘that’s sound good!’ She says,… then after a moment,…. ‘but I bought a can of corn beef hash and spam yesterday and that sounds even better’- things Filipino wives say even when they’re ‘dieting’
I tried spam for the first time fairly recently. Pretty good but holy hell is it salty. I’d be sucking down water the rest of the day if I ate it for breakfast.
 

ACamp1900

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I tried spam for the first time fairly recently. Pretty good but holy hell is it salty. I’d be sucking down water the rest of the day if I ate it for breakfast.
Yeah I’m not a fan even when doctored up like they make it,… corned beef hash I love tho and my wife killed it. So good. I’ll take deviled ham over spam when it comes to ‘broke ass canned meat’
 

ACamp1900

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Corned beef hash is great. I’m with the pinoys here


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For sure,… if my post sounded like I dislike CBH I mis-worded something. Even canned is among my fav breakfast options. I still had to laugh at her inner flip sabotaging breakfast tho.
 

zelezo vlk

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Oh nah. Surprised you don’t like fried spam tho.


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MacIrish75

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My wife is a huge fan of corned beef hash and chopped beef gravy on toast (SOS). Both make my stomach churn.
 

Some Irish Bloke

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It was pretty hot in the midwest this past week, especially over the weekend. Upper 80s, which is pretty hot this time of year. I reluctantly decided to give in and turn on the air, a modest 75 degrees. Didn't want to go too low this early in the spring/summer.

I go outside on Sunday to cut the grass and come back inside to an igloo; it was noticeably colder. Check the thermostat...sure enough it's set to 70.

I ask my lady: "you weren't okay with keeping it at 75? Had to knock it down five degrees?"

Her: "yeah, it was hot in here."

Me: "Do you think that has anything to do with the sweatpants, hoodie and slippers you're wearing or the blanket you're using?"

Her: "These are my comfortable clothes. And I like to use a blanket when I'm on the couch."

Me: "I'm sorry, I forgot a tee shirt/tank-top and shorts are horribly uncomfortable."
 

Rockin’Irish

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It was pretty hot in the midwest this past week, especially over the weekend. Upper 80s, which is pretty hot this time of year. I reluctantly decided to give in and turn on the air, a modest 75 degrees. Didn't want to go too low this early in the spring/summer.

I go outside on Sunday to cut the grass and come back inside to an igloo; it was noticeably colder. Check the thermostat...sure enough it's set to 70.

I ask my lady: "you weren't okay with keeping it at 75? Had to knock it down five degrees?"

Her: "yeah, it was hot in here."

Me: "Do you think that has anything to do with the sweatpants, hoodie and slippers you're wearing or the blanket you're using?"

Her: "These are my comfortable clothes. And I like to use a blanket when I'm on the couch."

Me: "I'm sorry, I forgot a tee shirt/tank-top and shorts are horribly uncomfortable."
I’ve seen this exact same thing with my GF……..she says she‘s hot and after the AC‘s been on for a bit, she‘s sitting on the couch under a blanket.
 

ACamp1900

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yeah I used to work at a school where the head administrator basically got the job because of daddy. She had no real leadership skills and eventually got fired for discrimination but prior to all that she insisted we all dress professional. Fair enough but her idea of professional dress changed dramatically male to female. Men had to suit up and keep the jacket on. Girls just had to ‘look cute’ and could get away with short skirts and spaghetti straps.

Now this was in the Mojave desert not too far from Death Valley so yeah. All the men would be dying but she wouldn’t turn the air on because ‘the girls get too cold’. Well shit stop wearing a nightie to work maybe!?! It was awful.

I will say though. My AC is set at 67 every night. It’s glorious.
 

IrishLion

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It was pretty hot in the midwest this past week, especially over the weekend. Upper 80s, which is pretty hot this time of year. I reluctantly decided to give in and turn on the air, a modest 75 degrees. Didn't want to go too low this early in the spring/summer.

I go outside on Sunday to cut the grass and come back inside to an igloo; it was noticeably colder. Check the thermostat...sure enough it's set to 70.

I ask my lady: "you weren't okay with keeping it at 75? Had to knock it down five degrees?"

Her: "yeah, it was hot in here."

Me: "Do you think that has anything to do with the sweatpants, hoodie and slippers you're wearing or the blanket you're using?"

Her: "These are my comfortable clothes. And I like to use a blanket when I'm on the couch."

Me: "I'm sorry, I forgot a tee shirt/tank-top and shorts are horribly uncomfortable."
I am the opposite. At the first sign of heat-related adversity, I'm fighting with my wife over getting the thermostat set down to 70 lol.

My stepdad kept our thermostat at 68 when I was growing up, and I had a basement room with no windows and nowhere for the cold air to escape to... I lived in an ice cave, and loved every second of it.
 

Cackalacky2.0

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My house never gets above 72. 69-72 all year round. Have to keep the humidity out during the summer because it will instantly make it feel 5 degrees hotter if you dont.
 

Bishop2b5

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I am the opposite. At the first sign of heat-related adversity, I'm fighting with my wife over getting the thermostat set down to 70 lol.

My stepdad kept our thermostat at 68 when I was growing up, and I had a basement room with no windows and nowhere for the cold air to escape to... I lived in an ice cave, and loved every second of it.
That's me. I could live in Antarctica and sleep outside in the snow with the penguins and be comfortable.
 

ACamp1900

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Yep, the colder the better. My MiL is total opposite, if it’s below 95 it’s ‘freezing’ and I’m not exaggerating. It makes it hard for the two of us to go to each other’s houses. It can be 100 outside when she comes over, she’ll still be in four layers with a jacket
 

Some Irish Bloke

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I am the opposite. At the first sign of heat-related adversity, I'm fighting with my wife over getting the thermostat set down to 70 lol.

My stepdad kept our thermostat at 68 when I was growing up, and I had a basement room with no windows and nowhere for the cold air to escape to... I lived in an ice cave, and loved every second of it.
Don't get me wrong, when we get to the dog days of summer and it's 90 degrees with 100% humidity, it's set to 70 or 72. I guess I have some (perhaps flawed) principal that it's still "Spring" and I don't want to be shelling out cash this early when the low temperatures are still dropping to the mid-50s at night.

Once you start getting the highs in the 80s-90s and the lows are staying in the 70s, I'm as big of an AC fan as you can get.

BUT, you bet your ass I'll be in shorts, cut-offs, etc, not wrapped up in a blanket with winter clothes on lol
 

Wild Bill

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My thermostat went out last week when it was 90 plus. I have a lennox system with multiple zones and the prior owner installed an $800+ thermostat that I refuse to replace and it's seemingly impossible to install a different thermostat . We have had no AC and my wife was dying. It was hilarious. Anyway, a lennox rep is coming out tomorrow to fix/replace and it may be under warranty. Who the hell spends 800 on a thermostat.
 

Some Irish Bloke

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My thermostat went out last week when it was 90 plus. I have a lennox system with multiple zones and the prior owner installed an $800+ thermostat that I refuse to replace and it's seemingly impossible to install a different thermostat . We have had no AC and my wife was dying. It was hilarious. Anyway, a lennox rep is coming out tomorrow to fix/replace and it may be under warranty. Who the hell spends 800 on a thermostat.
Excuse me, good sir, but this is a "Wives and the Stupid Shit they Say/do" thread, not the "Thermostats and the Stupid Shit They Don't Do" thread.

In all seriousness, $800 for a thermostat is dumb as hell. Just give me one with a couple buttons: Up/Down and On/off.
 
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Irish#1

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Not my wife, but reminds me of a lady I worked with in the 80's. I was the Data Center Manager and since we worked in the data center, I was responsible for the facility as well as the computer room. She was constantly complaining that it was too cold in the programmers area. Had the HVAC guys see what they could do, but she was never happy. Fast forward 10 years. I'm working at Sallie Mae. This building is huge and the hallways went on forever. It's summer and I'm walking down the hall. Off in the distance I see a lady coming toward me and she's wearing a long wool winter coat. We get about 20ft apart and I'll be damned if it wasn't her. lol
 
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