If he DOES decide to play here's what I wouldn't mind seeing:
First series - Tosses a pick six.
Second series - Fumbles a snap that's scooped up for a TD.
Third series - Screws up a hand off to Peterson, also picked up and taken for a TD.
Fourth series - Called for intentional grounding on a third and five, punt returned for a TD.
Fifth series - Gets taken down for a twenty yard loss and is knocked senseless.*
Sixth series - On the bench.
After the game he announces his REAL retirement.
With such a dismal performance that leads to an embarrassing loss, everyone – Childress, Ziggy Wilf, his teammates and deluded fans – agree that it's time for him to drop the pads and pick up the fishing pole for good. C'est fin. Es todo. Sayonara.
*(Perhaps this should read "Gets some sense knocked into him.")