Who's the Punniest poster?

[koonja]

A friend and I got into an argument. He's kind of an arrogant you know what (wasn't Wooly). Anyway, it was about which of the 5 senses are most important to you (touch, smell, sight, hearing, taste).

They claimed hearing and touch were the 2 most important. I claimed sight and touch were the two most important and I didn't think it was even close (and I hate that phrase).

So I created a stupid twitter poll to get some outside opinions. It's at 100% sight (with only like 10 votes, but who cares).

I'm going to post this poll to his fbook tomorrow when the votes finish. Twitter only allows 4 voting options, so I polled touch, smell, sight, hearing.

I expect the results to continue to show that he's an idiot. But a clever idiot. So I want to find a way to incorporate ALL 4 senses into my post with puns.

So far I have one 'I hope this offers some insight'.. I want all 4.

Yes this is trivial. I have time on my hands. I want to stick it to him publicly. And I love puns. Where is dshans?

 

[woolybug25]

How about.... "Koon makes me want to stab my eyes out and put a pencil into my ear"?

 

[Irish#1]

A friend and I got into an argument. He's kind of an arrogant you know what (wasn't Wooly). Anyway, it was about which of the 5 senses are most important to you (touch, smell, sight, hearing, taste).

They claimed hearing and touch were the 2 most important. I claimed sight and touch were the two most important and I didn't think it was even close (and I hate that phrase).

So I created a stupid twitter poll to get some outside opinions. It's at 100% sight (with only like 10 votes, but who cares).

I'm going to post this poll to his fbook tomorrow when the votes finish. Twitter only allows 4 voting options, so I polled touch, smell, sight, hearing.

I expect the results to continue to show that he's an idiot. But a clever idiot. So I want to find a way to incorporate ALL 4 senses into my post with puns.

So far I have one 'I hope this offers some insight'.. I want all 4.

Yes this is trivial. I have time on my hands. I want to stick it to him publicly. And I love puns. Where is dshans?

So you finally conquered that crawl space?

 

[koonja]

I know your feelings (touch) on the matter, but let's hear (hearing) what the people have to say.

Yada yada yada.

End with - hopefully these statistics offer some insight (sight)...

3 down. 1 to go.

 

[koonja]

So you finally conquered that crawl space?

No lie - went in there yesterday. Only to verify something was unplugged. Baby steps.

 

[Irish#1]

I know your feelings (touch) on the matter, but let's hear (hearing) what the people have to say.

Yada yada yada.

End with - hopefully these statistics offer some insight (sight)...

3 down. 1 to go.

Keep going. In 5 minutes you'll have it figured out without our help.

 

[Irish Insanity]

I know your feelings (touch) on the matter, but let's hear (hearing) what the people have to say.

Yada yada yada.

End with - hopefully these statistics offer some insight (sight)...

3 down. 1 to go.

You're not actually 'hearing' something with an internet pole.

 

[koonja]

You're not actually 'hearing' something with an internet pole.

Fair. Maybe it can be improved upon. Smell/scent/stink/order is a tough one.

 

[wizards8507]

Insight and sight don't make a pun since the "-sight" in "insight" means "sight."

It's like saying "hear" and "hearing" make a pun. They're just the same words with a prefix or suffix on the end.

 

[koonja]

Insight and sight don't make a pun since the "-sight" in "insight" means "sight."

It's like saying "hear" and "hearing" make a pun. They're just the same words with a prefix or suffix on the end.

This is why I ask the smart people.

 

[wizards8507]

You're not actually 'hearing' something with an internet pole.

 

[IrishLion]

I'm gonna assume this thread only exists to further annoy Wooly.

 

[Whiskeyjack]

Those wires could be carrying internet traffic.

 

[koonja]

I'm gonna assume this thread only exists to further annoy Wooly.

I actually want a great post with all 4 puns. I don't want to upset him.

 

[BeauBenken]

I read the thread title originally as "who is the puniest poster?" To which Koon, we all thought it was obviously you.

 

[koonja]

I read the thread title originally as "who is the puniest poster?" To which Koon, we all thought it was obviously you.

It's clearly not. I'm waiting for some of the wordsmith's to put me on the right path.

 

[BeauBenken]

It's clearly not. I'm waiting for some of the wordsmith's to put me on the right path.

Ahem.

Puny, Adj.

Small; weak

 

[koonja]

Ahem.

Puny, Adj.

See, you might be my guy!

 

[wizards8507]

Those wires could be carrying internet traffic.

So you can hear something via an internet pole, but not by an internet poll.

 

[koonja]

So you can hear something via an internet pole, but not by an internet poll.

We're getting too specific. It needs to be somewhere between my awfully obvious (incorrect) try at a pun, and you guys breaking down the definitions of sound into radiowaves.

 

[wizards8507]

 

[Veritate Duce Progredi]

I read the thread title originally as "who is the puniest poster?" To which Koon, we all thought it was obviously you.

Ha ha, I was about to post: 5'9, 169

 

[Irish YJ]

How about.... "Koon makes me want to stab my eyes out and put a pencil into my ear"?

Then according to himself/Koon, he's not that bad. If someone made you want to stab your eyes out, and cut off your hands, he would be worse than Koon?

 

[irishdiehard]

This thread stinks!(1) I don't mean to hurt your feelings (2) but it looks (3) like this thread isn't providing any insight (4)!

 

[irishdiehard]

Just kidding koon. This isnt exactly a pun but its the best I could come up with off the top of my head:

Stinks to be you! I don't mean to hurt your feelings but it looks like the people have provided some insight!

 

[phillyirish]

I know your feelings (touch) on the matter, but let's hear (hearing) what the people have to say.

Yada yada yada.

End with - hopefully these statistics offer some insight (sight)...

3 down. 1 to go.

Im no expert but I don't think using the same word in the context it's supposed to be in is a pun. Now if you said "let's get you opinions in hear!" That's a pun, cause your using a homophone (lol my phone autocorrects 'homophone' to 'homophobe' almost left it cause that's hilarious) in the wrong context. A corny pun like that and your sure to get a grammar nazi commenting with "here*".

So in short, please don't f*cking use the examples you came up with cause they suck and aren't puns.

Edit: didn't read the comments but looks like this has been covered.

 

[dshans]

While I may be a puny punster, I do better when (twisted) spontaneity is the guiding force.

Puns R Us I ain't.

I'll give it some thought. Sleep on it. Crowd source those parts of my brain not immediately preoccupied with breathing, eating, scratching and REM sleep.

I'll get back to you.