Strong Men Cry Too.

[no.1IrishFan]

I cried for the first time today since my grandfather died 7 years ago. My fiance is 6 weeks prego and I'm at the end of my rope.
Who the eff is this monster?
I know her hormones are out of control, but she has literally broken me over the last 2 weeks.
I'm a grown man who is scared to talk, move, laugh, eat, touch, think or even blink.

I need someone to tell me they love me and that everything is gonna be ok.

Please tell me I'm not the only one with a significant other that has turned into lucifer once she became pregnant.

Any suggestions are much appreciated.

I love you guys.

 

[johnnycando]

I cried for the first time today since my grandfather died 7 years ago. My fiance is 6 weeks prego and I'm at the end of my rope.
Who the eff is this monster?
I know her hormones are out of control, but she has literally broken me over the last 2 weeks.
I'm a grown man who is scared to talk, move, laugh, eat, touch, think or even blink.

I need someone to tell me they love me and that everything is gonna be ok.

Please tell me I'm not the only one with a significant other that has turned into lucifer once she became pregnant.

Any suggestions are much appreciated.

I love you guys.

Hormones are remarkable chemicals.

But her decisions are her own amigo.

You need to hold her accountable for her actions.

It is your fault, but only 50% to fault, regarding her condition. But pregnancy should be a change and a good one for both of you.

Is she that unhappy she's pregnant?

I have 3 daughters.

 

[NDRock]

Any suggestions are much appreciated.

Don't get married.

 

[Irish Insanity]

Assuming by the OP, this isn't a joke. I'll skip the smart ass answer like the one above.

Your engaged, and pregnant for a reason. Get married.

Remind her of why your in those positions. Your feelings for her and your future together. But also, help her understand your part in this too. She may be the one with the changes in her body, and hormones, but its not like it doesn't affect you.

Good luck. I don't know your fiance, or how reasonable of a person she was prior, but its only week 6. Its gonna be a long ride. But it will all be worth it in the end.

 

[Irishnuke]

I cried for the first time today since my grandfather died 7 years ago. My fiance is 6 weeks prego and I'm at the end of my rope.
Who the eff is this monster?
I know her hormones are out of control, but she has literally broken me over the last 2 weeks.
I'm a grown man who is scared to talk, move, laugh, eat, touch, think or even blink.

I need someone to tell me they love me and that everything is gonna be ok.

Please tell me I'm not the only one with a significant other that has turned into lucifer once she became pregnant.

Any suggestions are much appreciated.

I love you guys.

Lol. Six weeks isn't shit. Buckle in. It gets worse before it gets better.

 

[BobD]

First off I'm sorry you're having these issues and I hope you find a way to work things out with her.

Without knowing a lot more about you and her there is no way to give any reliable advice. If she's just 6 weeks into it and has done a complete 180, my best guess is there are bigger issues than just hormones.

Now that I've offered a serious response, here's my IE brotherly advice:

PIIHB

 

[no.1IrishFan]

I should say that she is an incredibly logical and reasonable woman for the most part, that's what really attracted me to her in the first place.
I know she's the one for me, I'm just wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences with pregnancies?

It's more like the scene from Knocked Up when she kicks him out of the car in the middle of the road for no reason lol.

 

[Irish Insanity]

If she's normally very reasonable and logical, most likely she's having a hard time herself dealing with how she's changed. The crazy ones are used to being crazy. When the pregnancy and hormones come, there is nothing different for them.

 

[NCND]

Don't get married.

+1. But, take care and don't do anything that will put u in jail.

 

[tussin]

Yup, PIIHB

 

[BobD]

You should have seen this prior to choosing any woman.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/hKWmFWRVLlU" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

 

[Wild Bill]

Two of my buddies went through the same shit. They are both married to bitches, so I'm not sure there was much of a change.

Google child support. You'll find her more tolerable once you start calculating.

Good luck, my man.

 

[Woneone]

My wife is currently pregnant with children 2 and 3 (yes, twins). We'll have 3 under the age of 2 when they're born around Christmas.

My advice is this: Do whatever you can to placate her rage, and try as much as possible to make sure those things are AWAY from her.

As a very recent example, I awoke this morning finding her hovered over me (like how those murder mysteries start on TV), all pissed off about nothing. So, I "volunteered" to mow our grass (an hour), sweep and carpet clean 3 rooms (2 hours). I had my phone/iPad as much as possible, watching Netflix, just getting away. Your "me" time should now be under the cover of doing stuff for her.

When you do go out, go places where she can't destroy you. Again, for example, my wife wanted out of the house, I took her to a movie. A place that requires quiet and where there were plenty of witnesses should things "take a turn...".

Finally, ask in advance. Don't try to get away the day of to do something. I've already asked permission, probably 20 times, for next Saturday "off" so I can watch the game with friends. She said "No", but at least I tried....

Good luck to you. You're screwed for the next 6 months.

 

[phork]

Pray for a quick death.

Every see the Terry Tate series of videos? If not, please do. If so, adapt to home environment.

 

[NCND]

You should have seen this prior to choosing any woman.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/hKWmFWRVLlU" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

That was awesome and very true.

 

[Bubbles]

Be a good man. (this is enough, but see below)







If you are a good man, a good husband/boyfriend/etc, you have to have an almost immeasurable amount of patience for the psychosis that is woman. But buckle the fuck up, son, because kids bring it to a whole new level.

If she's worth it, and I suspect you already know the answer to that, you will make it work. You will do whatever she needs, be whatever she needs, call her on her bullshit if that's what she needs.....but you will make it work. You'll fight, yell, kick and scream, but you will make it work.

Final thought......when you are at your wits end, find a place to be alone and try to imagine what she's going through. Multiply that by 10 and you're in the ballpark.

 

[Irish Insanity]

IIRC vibrators were developed by a doctor years ago to treat hysteria. So maybe buy some of those remote control vibrating crotch panties. Any time you deem necessary, hit the button. It should calm her down.

 

[Irish#1]

Just a couple of guesses here. Maybe she is pissed because you're not married? Even in today's society and looseness on morals, that vast majority of women want to be married before they become pregnant.

If this isn't it, then there is something else going on. Maybe she doesn't see your relationship going anywhere and is pissed because now there is a permanent link between you two.

41 years of marriage, five pregnancies and menopause. Yeah, I know what I'm talking about.

 

[greyhammer90]

Sooooooo who's never having kids after this thread? * Raises hand*

 

[zelezo vlk]

Maybe this is coming from the lack of sleep from last night, but I have an idea. If you knock up her sister, that'd solve everything, right?

No? Okay I'll shut up now.

 

[goldandblue]

Wow, much different experience than I had with a pregnant wife. I have 3 children and my wife was overall really happy and excited when she was pregnant. We did have some attitude issues later in the pregnancy. Months 7-9 were a little rough but that was because she was exhausted for the most part and that can make anyone ill.

Are you sure she is happy with the current situation?

 

[Ndaccountant]

My wife is pregnant now with our second. There are times when emotion gets the best of her. Sometimes it's justified, sometimes not. The only thing that made it better for me was to let her know, once she is calmed down, that she was acting crazy (though I would use softer words than that). What usually would happen is that she would vent to me about something she was holding inside. Sometimes it was frustration with work, with me, or just plain ole overwhelmed. We talk it through and usually come out better because of it. For one, I could understand what she was feeling. Plus, she could have confidence to say what she was truly feeling, instead of internalizing it.

My advice.....try and figure out what is bothering her. As men, we like to blame the hormones of pregnancy. Truth is, at least in my experience, the hormones exaggerate the emotion surrounding her true feelings but the feelings are still there. I won't guess what those are, since I have no clue who you two are and what you have been through (as a couple and before you met). Communicate, listen and sympathize.

 

[Bogtrotter07]

How are boundaries between her dad and mom, and with her siblings?

Has she ever indicated to you, or do you believe life will be in some way better when you have kids, or are married?

Does she have something specific that she complains about, like a constant theme?

Spend some time closing your eyes; does she look better as an ex-girlfriend, or an ex-wife?

What are you willing to give up to be married to her?

If you answer your life, or your self, to the last question, the problem is more you than her.

Otherwise, if you get a nagging feeling at the first four questions, she has some things to work on.

If not one of these is true in your mind, all you need to do is man up, and grow a set of balls. But you need to be as kind as strong. Then if it is going to work, you should be on your way!

Seven kids, that I know of, over 25 years, two wives. I used to live in the danger zone.

 

[IrishLion]

I'm never having children.

 

[PANDFAN]

if she was fine before the pregnancy then i would lean more towards that being the issue...her hormones are acting on her which exacerbateS her mood but can change frequently...it can be anything which triggers a change in mood....i have been in your shoes, minus the logical and reasonable prior to being pregnant...scary scary thing for a mom because of all of the unknowns, plus she probably isn't sleeping well most of the nights, she prob isn't feeling very good about herself because of the body changes etc...it does a lot to the psyche of the person...then you have your own needs which get put on the back burner because she and the soon to be kids are #1...it does a lot to yours as well...we all have a hierarchy of needs and when they are not being met it causes issues...i would try to sit down w/ your fiance and discuss things...NO finger pointing, just point out how you feel when she does things...and ask if there are things you could possibly do for her to help her ...its a starting point...but having resentment at the early stage before marriage isn't good and it will only continue to fester...trust me communication is key! if she respects you she will talk it through w/ you

 

[Bogtrotter07]

if she was fine before the pregnancy then i would lean more towards that being the issue...her hormones are acting on her which exacerbate her mood but can change frequently...it can be anything which triggers a change in mood....i have been in your shoes, minus the logical and reasonable prior to being pregnant...scary scary thing for a mom because of all of the unknowns, plus she probably isn't sleeping well most of the nights, she prob isn't feeling very good about herself because of the body changes etc...it does a lot to the psyche of the person...then you have your own needs which get put on the back burner because she and the soon to be kids are #1...it does a lot to yours as well...we all have a hierarchy of needs and when they are not being met it causes issues...i would try to sit down w/ your fiance and discuss things...NO finger pointing, just point out how you feel when she does things...and ask if there are things you could possibly do for her to help her ...its a starting point...but having resentment at the early stage before marriage isn't good and it will only continue to fester...trust me communication is key! if she respects you she will talk it through w/ you

10 points for using exacerbate in a sentence. But not to appear too picayune, but "exacerbate" is just like "masturbate" when dealing with pluralization; they masturbate, but he masturbates. So "her hormones are acting on her which exacerbates her mood but can change frequently" would be more apropos.

Other than that the post was damned fine in content! Reps, sir!

And yes, we all are fucked, aren't we?

 

[absoluteirish59]

I cried for the first time today since my grandfather died 7 years ago. My fiance is 6 weeks prego and I'm at the end of my rope.
Who the eff is this monster?
I know her hormones are out of control, but she has literally broken me over the last 2 weeks.
I'm a grown man who is scared to talk, move, laugh, eat, touch, think or even blink.

I need someone to tell me they love me and that everything is gonna be ok.

Please tell me I'm not the only one with a significant other that has turned into lucifer once she became pregnant.

Any suggestions are much appreciated.

I love you guys.

Haagen Dazs my man, and lots of it. Or whatever her favorite sweet tooth is.

 

[RyCo1983]

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/PlEmKXm9eCE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Feed her whatever she wants.

 

[BobD]

 

[Wild Bill]

How are boundaries between her dad and mom, and with her siblings?

Has she ever indicated to you, or do you believe life will be in some way better when you have kids, or are married?

Does she have something specific that she complains about, like a constant theme?

Spend some time closing your eyes; does she look better as an ex-girlfriend, or an ex-wife?

What are you willing to give up to be married to her?

If you answer your life, or your self, to the last question, the problem is more you than her.

Otherwise, if you get a nagging feeling at the first four questions, she has some things to work on.

If not one of these is true in your mind, all you need to do is man up, and grow a set of balls. But you need to be as kind as strong. Then if it is going to work, you should be on your way!

Seven kids, that I know of, over 25 years, two wives. I used to live in the danger zone.

Seven kids, bogs? You really are a mad man.