Riddickulous
"That" Guy
- Messages
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- Reaction score
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I have a gut feeling (just an inkling) that you are so wrong that it defies all of the laws of human decency.
Here's a more likely scenario:
We whiff on all of our receiver targets and end offering a 1* 5'6" white receiver from Alaska named Philbert Jenkins who runs a 5.5 40. Every receiver except Roby Toma transfers to Michigan, so Bruce Heggie is converted to wide receiver. Because of this, the X and Y positions are merged into a single position called the Heggie.
Heggie explodes, becoming the first ironman football player in half a century. He catches 145 passes for 2,349 yards and 38 TDs, runs for an additional 1,301 yards with 15 scores, returns 22 kicks for 790 yards and 4 touchdowns, and returns 12 punts for 389 yards and 3 scores. He also plays Will linebacker, racking up 234 tackles, 18 sacks, 5 interceptions, 7 forced fumbles, and one kill, hitting Matt Barkley so hard that his soul is forced out of his body, where it floats aimlessly to the furthest corners of the universe like a tumbleweed in the wind. On special teams, he makes an additional 46 tackles, putting his season total at 280, and forces three more fumbles. Heggie wins the Heisman Trophy, Maxwell Award, Walter Camp Award, Biletnikoff Award, Best Kickoff Returner Award, Bednarik Award. He is a Unanimous All-American selection.
Afterwards, Heggie is named emperor of the Milky Way Galaxy and he builds Earth into a utopia. He ascends to heaven in 2056 AD.
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This guy would be a fantastic addition.
