Steven Seagal

In Lou I Trust

Offseason gon' be long
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Watching "Marked for Death." Steven Seagal is the $#!*. I could watch him snap necks and cash checks all day long.
 

phork

Raining On Your Parade
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Does he have any college eligibility left?
 

RyCo1983

Formerly known as TheFlyingAlamo
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Smells like jealousy...

I appreciate a good action movie just as much as the next guy...I really do...but GOOD GOD he is terrible. The best film he is in is Executive Decision with Kurt Russell...and only because Seagal's character doesn't last very long!
 
J

johnnykillz

Guest
Guys: Statham is a bad dude.

But Chuck Norris is on a different plane!

Seagal does have the best hair.

We use the same barber: Once a decade.
 

tadman95

I have a bigger bullet
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Under Siege was his best movie because Erika Eleniak was in it topless. Let's keep our perspective here......
 
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Buster Bluth

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I read a bit online about all of Seagal's movies being verb phrases or whatever.

Steven Seagal is ________. Insert movie.

He's a terrible actor and all of his movies lack any semblance of plot.
 

tadman95

I have a bigger bullet
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I read a bit online about all of Seagal's movies being verb phrases or whatever.

Steven Seagal is ________. Insert movie.

He's a terrible actor and all of his movies lack any semblance of plot.

"Erika Eleniak" naked. Buster, step away from the keyboard......
 

Black Irish

Wise Guy
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There is a Hollywood urban legend that some mega-agent bet someone that he could take the most uncharismatic plank of wood and make him a star. Said agent was taking Aikido classes at the time from... wait for it..... Steven Seagal!

Supposedly the agent tossed Seagal a pile of scripts and told him to pick one. Either way, Seagal is lucky Andrew "The Fugitive" Davis directed his debut. We will probably never know, but makes for a great story.
 

irishog77

NOT SINBAD's NEPHEW
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Steve should already be the owner of at least 2 Oscars.

Above the Law is his best flick. If nothing else, his character has a sweet @ss name-- Mason Storm.
 
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Buster Bluth

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"Erika Eleniak" naked. Buster, step away from the keyboard......

Man if you're watching feature films for the nude scenes, I almost don't want to tell you how much porn there is on the internet, and how few clicks away it is at any moment.
 

phork

Raining On Your Parade
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Man if you're watching feature films for the nude scenes, I almost don't want to tell you how much porn there is on the internet, and how few clicks away it is at any moment.

Do Share.... I bet your collection of links is vast...
 
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Bogtrotter07

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I wasn't going to post here, becuase I didn't want this thread to follow me around, but then I rembered I could divorce any thread I wanted.

Divorce:

The one memorable thing, (for me about Steven Segal.)

First he was all in love with Kelly LeBrock, then they did a bad movie or two, then BANG! DIVORCE!

Steven Segal said, when they asked him if he ever saw himself getting married again, "Naw, I just think I am going to find a woman that hates me and give her a house." Others may have said it, but with his deadpan delivery, he was absolutely awesome! It was his best role ever!

For the big boys:
As far as martial arts, films, Chuck Norris, Steven Segal, etc. It doesn't matter - if you try any of that you are going to get your *** shot (off). Trust me, someone will not forget the bullets and they will get the kill shot off.

If you don't have a gun, I am grabbing a rock.
Without guns, the guy with the biggest rock or club wins.

Bruce Lee is the exception. He was so fast and strong that film could not do him justice. Bruce's true value is not his ability, but the art and cultural history he promoted. And he was an awesome Kato, and should have been Kwai Chang Caine, a role he created and envisioned.

Now you want to see a real beast?

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/4Wxe3u-K8H8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
 
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