Wives and the Stupid **** They Say/Do

Irish2155

Irish2155

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My lady’s bday is in late November and I typically don’t buy her gift until Xmas. 🤷‍♂️
 
FU BK

FU BK

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My wife's birthday is a week before our anniversary. Over what will be 21 years tomorrow, I don't think I've remembered both...its always one or the other. She's usually pissy for a day, but still taking up 3/4 of the bed
 
Irish#1

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FU BK said:
My wife's birthday is a week before our anniversary. Over what will be 21 years tomorrow, I don't think I've remembered both...its always one or the other. She's usually pissy for a day, but still taking up 3/4 of the bed
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I know that feeling. Mine is always telling me she's sleeping on the edge, yet every time I wake up, she's in the middle and I'm on the edge. She also has this Mt. Everest thing built out of pillows and I can't tell you how many times I've been woken because she flipped a pillow in my face as she readjusted her domain.

BTW.......If learning to sleep on the edge of the bed was an Olympic sport, I'd be the gold medalist every time.
 
FU BK

FU BK

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Irish#1 said:
I know that feeling. Mine is always telling me she's sleeping on the edge, yet every time I wake up, she's in the middle and I'm on the edge. She also has this Mt. Everest thing built out of pillows and I can't tell you how many times I've been woken because she flipped a pillow in my face as she readjusted her domain.

BTW.......If learning to sleep on the edge of the bed was an Olympic sport, I'd be the gold medalist every time.
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Our wives must be related. Half the time I have one butt cheek hanging over the edge
 
Irish#1

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FU BK said:
Our wives must be related. Half the time I have one butt cheek hanging over the edge
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SDIrishFan said:
My wife must be semi-related, but instead of the bed, she "tucks and rolls" with all the cover so by the middl of the night I have a leg and an arm cover. It's awesome...
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It's probably some female gene they all have.
 
SDIrishFan

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GrangerIrish24 said:
I survived. Even snuck in some average sex.
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ulukinatme

ulukinatme

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Irish#1 said:
I know that feeling. Mine is always telling me she's sleeping on the edge, yet every time I wake up, she's in the middle and I'm on the edge. She also has this Mt. Everest thing built out of pillows and I can't tell you how many times I've been woken because she flipped a pillow in my face as she readjusted her domain.

BTW.......If learning to sleep on the edge of the bed was an Olympic sport, I'd be the gold medalist every time.
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I don't know, I think I'd keep it close :laugh: Since the day my first was born there's often been a kid sharing the bed with us, exception being if it's a relations night. Between one of the kids and my wife I've been living on the edge for a good 16 years consistently, usually with one of the kids elbowing me or kicking me. You've probably got me beat by experience.

I've got a solution for @SDIrishFan 's wife hoggin' the covers: separate sheets save marriages! I figured this one out early. My wife used to have a heated blanket she would sleep with all the time. I had a nice, thick comforter I would use. When she inevitably burned out the element in the heated blanket, instead of buying another element she threw the whole thing out and started stealing my new comforter. What'd I do? I bought a whole new comforter for myself and gave her the old one. Boom! The blanket is all mine again, no stealing.
 
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Irish#1

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ulukinatme said:
I don't know, I think I'd keep it close :laugh: Since the day my first was born there's often been a kid sharing the bed with us, exception being if it's a relations night. Between one of the kids and my wife I've been living on the edge for a good 16 years consistently, usually with one of the kids elbowing me or kicking me. You've probably got me beat by experience.

I've got a solution for @SDIrishFan 's wife hoggin' the covers: separate sheets save marriages! I figured this one out early. My wife used to have a heated blanket she would sleep with all the time. I had a nice, thick comforter I would use. When she inevitably burned out the element in the heated blanket, instead of buying another element she threw the whole thing out and started stealing my new comforter. What'd I do? I bought a whole new comforter for myself and gave her the old one. Boom! The blanket is all mine again, no stealing.
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This man is a genius.
 
Jiggafini19Deux

Jiggafini19Deux

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I have probably sustained more injuries while asleep in the last 10 years than I did in 13 years of playing football from 5th grade up through FCS college ball.

Waking up at 2 AM with someone's knees dug deep into the middle of your spine is not what I signed up for.
 
SDIrishFan

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Irish#1 said:
This man is a genius.
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ulukinatme said:
I've got a solution for @SDIrishFan 's wife hoggin' the covers: separate sheets save marriages! I figured this one out early. My wife used to have a heated blanket she would sleep with all the time. I had a nice, thick comforter I would use. When she inevitably burned out the element in the heated blanket, instead of buying another element she threw the whole thing out and started stealing my new comforter. What'd I do? I bought a whole new comforter for myself and gave her the old one. Boom! The blanket is all mine again, no stealing.
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Oh believe me, this idea has been floated a time or two. Might just have to pull the trigger on it.
 
Irish#1

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Jiggafini19Deux said:
I have probably sustained more injuries while asleep in the last 10 years than I did in 13 years of playing football from 5th grade up through FCS college ball.

Waking up at 2 AM with someone's knees dug deep into the middle of your spine is not what I signed up for.
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Sleeping on the edge, sleeping without covers, sleeping with a knee redirecting your spine. Our crosses to bear.
 
NDBoiler

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Wife went to take her car to the Honda dealer today to get an oil change/tire rotation. I ask her how much it was, since pretty much every place around had coupons for like $70 for this. Oh no, it was $200 she says. Come to find out the automated service checklist they send you while you wait to get you pay for extra stuff that you didn’t come there for included replacing the cabin and engine air filters with the oil change. When she went to the service desk to tell them she didn’t want those other services included, they told her that they had already done them. Mind you, this is before she approved/declined it. So I’m thinking, if it was me, I’m telling these knuckleheads to either put my old filters back on or leave what you did, because either way I’m not paying for something I didn’t tell you to do. So what does she do? She just pays the $200 and leaves. 😐
 
SDIrishFan

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NDBoiler said:
Wife went to take her car to the Honda dealer today to get an oil change/tire rotation. I ask her how much it was, since pretty much every place around had coupons for like $70 for this. Oh no, it was $200 she says. Come to find out the automated service checklist they send you while you wait to get you pay for extra stuff that you didn’t come there for included replacing the cabin and engine air filters with the oil change. When she went to the service desk to tell them she didn’t want those other services included, they told her that they had already done them. Mind you, this is before she approved/declined it. So I’m thinking, if it was me, I’m telling these knuckleheads to either put my old filters back on or leave what you did, because either way I’m not paying for something I didn’t tell you to do. So what does she do? She just pays the $200 and leaves. 😐
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I'm going through something similar with my mom. I think car dealers/mechanics love when women come in. They just see dollar signs and a chance to take advantage of someone.
 
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