Anti-jokes

[clashmore_mike]

Anti Joke - Funny Anti Jokes


An Irishman walks out of a bar.

 

[RyCo1983]

Mike...great find!

 

[NoJusticeNoPeace]

Oh no. These jokes have a tendency to become an obsession of mine.

Why did the plane crash?
Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

 

[NeuteredDoomer]

A blonde walks into a hairdressers salon. She gets her hair cut.



Haikus are easy,
But sometimes they don't make sense.
Refrigerator.

 

[clashmore_mike]

How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

 

[NoJusticeNoPeace]

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar.

 

[Old Man Mike]

A gigantic spaceship lands on the ND practice field. Huge extraterrestrials get out.

They tasted like chicken.

 

[clashmore_mike]

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar.

what did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute?

My illness prevents me from achieving erection.

 

[Old Man Mike]

There were three men on the plane but only two parachutes.
It was in the hangar.

 

[NeuteredDoomer]

Knock knock
Who's there
The mailman
The mailman who?
You are so dumb.


Ask me if I'm a tree.

Are you a tree?

No.

 

[Old Man Mike]

Two forbidden lovers [Joe and Jolene] agreed to meet at the masked ball.
Afterwards back at the apartment they took off the masks.
He was NOT Joe!!
She was NOT Jolene!!

 

[Old Man Mike]

Why did the chicken...whoops...never made it...

 

[Lou Holtz]

How do you kill a blonde?

Well there are many ways, but all of which are wrong because murder is illegal.

 

[BurningRiver]

my favorite one:
roses are red
violets are blue
i have a gun
get in the van.

 

[bert2834]

What's green and has wheels?

Grass, I lied about the wheels!

 

[rikkitikki08]

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
One.