When I lived in New Mexico, they always had a phrase, “thank God for Mississippi and Alabama.” Because it was one of those two states that kept New Mexico from being last place in every educational statistic. But I just looked and New Mexico cannot thank them anymore. New Mexico probably has to be the worst state on the planet in regards to talent and academics. Probably last in both metrics.
Transcript from one of my favorite SNL skits - the 1992 Presidential Debate. Wish I could find the video.
Bill Clinton: Sam, you must have watched too many of my opponent’s TV spots. I’m tired of the Bush campaign trying to portray my home state as some sort of primitive Third World country. The fact is, Arkansas
did have a long way to go, but we’ve made progress. When I started as governor,we were fiftieth in adult literacy, and last year, I’m proud to say, we shot ahead of Mississippi. We’re #49, and we’re closing fast on Alabama. Watch out, Alabama – we got your number!
George Bush: Can I say something here? Two years ago, I went on a fishing trip in Arkansas with Baker, Fitzwater, Quayle, myself. We were chased and assaulted by a couple of inbred mountain people. I was sworn to secrecy as to those events, but suffice it to say, they felt that Dan Quayle -and I quote – “sure had a purty mouth.” Now, if that’s the kind of progress Bill Clinton brought to Arkansas..
I don’t think we need it in the White House!
Bill Clinton: That’s not fair. Just this year we passed Mississippi to become 41st in the prevention of rickets.
Ross Perot: Can I jump in here? Why are we talking about Arkansas? Hell,everybody knows that all they got down there is a bunch of ignorant inbred crackerheads! Peckerwoods, catch me? now, can we talk about the deficit?While we’ve been jabbering, our deficit has increased by half a million dollars. That’s enough to buy a still and a new outhouse for every family in Little Rock!