Great ND joke

[Bubba]

A highly recruited high school football player was visiting schools to try
and find the best college for him.

His first stop was at The University of Texas. When he got there, Coach
Brown immediately picked up a golden telephone. After talking several
minutes, he said, "Thank you, God" and hung up.

This shocked the young man. He asked the coach what was so special about
the golden phone. "Well, this phone is a direct line to God. And God tells
us whether or not new recruits would be stars at our university.

The athlete asked if he could use the phone to ask God what college he
should pick "Sure, you can! But it's going to cost you $750.
Calling Heaven ain't cheap."

The fellow didn't have that kind of money, so he moved along.

His next stop was University of Southern California.

Upon entering Coach Carroll's office, Coach immediately picked up a
golden telephone. After talking several minutes, he said, "Thank you, God"
and hung up.

The boy said, "Hey, I've seen those phones before.
Can I use yours to call God and ask what college I should pick?"

Carroll said, "Sure, but it's going to cost you $2,000.
Calling Heaven isn't cheap.."

Again, not having that kind of money, the lad left.

His last stop was in South Bend, Indiana.

Upon arrival at the office, Coach Weis picked up a golden telephone,
talked to God, and said, "Thanks," and hung up.

The boy just had to use that phone, so he said, "Coach, I really need to
use that golden telephone so I can call God and ask him which college I
should choose.

From The University of Texas it was going to cost me $750.

From The University of Southern California they wanted $2,000.

So how much will it cost me to call GOD from here in South Bend?"





The coach smiled and said, "Nothing, son. It's a local call. In fact, if
you would like to speak to him in person his office is just down the hall."


GO IRISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[LuckoftheIrish86]

LOL so true

 

[irishwavend]

Three football players are out driving around and decide to stop into the grocery store. The ol boy from Ole Miss takes the lead and says, "Scuse, me sir, do you have any maters, taters, or nanners?" The man replies, "You must be from Ole Miss." "Wow, how'd you know?" exclaimed the Ole Miss football player. "I can just tell by your accent."

The three players leave the store in awe, so they decide they are going to stop and try this in another grocery store. As they go in, the ol boy from U of Memphis takes the lead and says, "Scuse, me sir, do you have any maters, taters, or nanners?" The man replies, "You must be from Memphis." "Wow, how'd you know?" exclaimed the Memphis football player. "I can just tell by your accent."

The players, again, leave in wonder, so the Tennessee football player HAS to try this out. The ol boy from Tennessee takes the lead and says, "Scuse, me sir, do you have any maters, taters, or nanners?" The man replies, "You must be from UT." "Wow, how'd you know?" the flabbergasted Tennessee football player exclaimed. "Well, boy, this is a hardware store!"

 

[Aerosmith777]

Ok, I know a lot of you have heard this one before, but I thought it was hilarious to I'm repeating it for the benefit of those who've never heard it. Seems relevant to this week anyway:

The youngest child of a family of Michigan fans is out doing his Christmas shopping. Both his parents are alumni of UM, and his older sister is at home on break from Michigan.

They're in a sporting goods store, and the 12-year-old boy spots a Notre Dame jersey. He just stands there, staring at it for awhile. His sister walks up to him and asks, "What are you staring at?" To which he replies, "I've just decided that from now on I'm a Notre Dame fan, and I'd like this jersey for Christmas." His sister punches him hard in the arm, and tells him to go say that to his mother.

So the boy grabs the jersey, walks over to his mother and says, "Mom, I've decided from this point on I'm a Notre Dame fan and I'd like this for Christmas." The mother is shocked, and smacks him across the face and tells him to got tell his father.

So the boy walks over to his father with the jersey in hand and says, "Dad, I've just decided from this point on I'm a Notre Dame fan, I want to go there when I graduate high school, and I'd like this for Christmas." His father belts him one hard across the face and says, "NO son of MINE will EVER wear that in my house! Put it back now!"

So the four of them are in the car on their way home a little while later, and the boy is sulking in the backseat. His father looks at him in the rear-view mirror and says, "Son, I hope you've learned something today."

Rather sarcastically, and without raising his eyes, the boy replies, "Sure did."

The father notices his tone and asks, "What's that?"

The boy looks up and says, "I've only been a Notre Dame fan for about an hour and I already hate you Michigan bastards."