Endless ennui ..... in a desperate attempt at surviving the end of July, I offer the following alternative offensive pattern: this was telepathically sent to me by Neutered, so he deserves the full credit. It is called the "Knocker", sort of a partial transliteration of "leprechaun" spelled backwards [ you know, "nuahcer-pel"]. [hey, it's my story....]
This offensive alignment is best understood by a visualization.
Notre Dame has as usual swept down the field between the twenties but found the going tough in the red zone. This time, Dayne found Mike Floyd for a first down at the four, but Cierre was stacked up at the three. Kelly shook his head and turned to page 926 in the playbook. He turned to the sideline and yelled "Knocker!!". Five guys let out whoops and slammed on their helmets.
On the field, Dayne is momentarily confused. There goes Cierre and Jonas is coming out, but Mike is taking the whole receiving corps off the field with him. Behind Jonas are what seem to be a whole crowd of guys. In fact there are only four --- they just look like a whole crowd. Dayne recognizes a big redhead [one of the seven highest structures in Indiana] and says: "Oh, Knocker."
Notre Dame breaks the huddle. The middle linebacker yells "jumbo!" He's correct. Chase Hounshell lines up beside Zach Martin on the Left. Tony Springmann lines up beside Taylor Dever on the right. The DE who has been battling Taylor all day looks at Springmann and mutters: "Gawd..."
Just flanked outside Tony is Troy Niklas, the largest most athletic, meanest flanker in football history. The DBs on that side are considering calling time out. The middle linebacker shifts the strength of his line towards Springmann. They become slightly more relaxed.
Dayne finds himself under center with a small giggle that he has to suppress. Deep in the "I" is Jonas. Between him and Dayne is a very large entity named Ishaq. Everyone is now considering calling time-out.
The ball's snapped. It's deception and we run left. Troy and Tony don't mind; they blast the wadden out of somebody anyway, just for fun. Chase comes off the ball like a Tasmanian Devil, chips Zach's DE, who then is pancaked. Hounshell swallows up the nearby linebacker.
Ishaq begins to move. The corner decides that he must have outside contain [despite no one being there] and gets out of the way. Ishaq immediately alters his course towards the strong safety, who is not feeling so strong at the moment but is going to take one for the team. Bad things happen. Jonas hands the ball to the official deep in the endzone.
Dayne is at the five smiling. "Why didn't coach go to page 927 so I could fake it to Jonas and score myself?" On the sidelines, Andrew Hendrix catches the telepathic vibe. "Sorry, Dayne, that's MY play!". Golson nudges him: "want to race for it?"
Kelly just smiles with a devilish gleam in his eye: "Knock-Out...".
No safeties were injured making this movie.
