Enter The Weird World Of Stalking Eagle

[OchoShayneO]

What about midget sex?

Funny you mention that. My local paper advertised it in a club this weekend but I couldnt make the trip. So I'm not going to pass judgement until I see a show.

 

[WabashFalcon]

Shouldn't midget porn be half off?

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

Shouldn't midget porn be half off?

Yes it should be - hands down.

 

[no.1IrishFan]

Dear Stalking Eagle, In the heat of the moment last night I did something with my girlfriend that I have never done before.......I.....um.....well I tried to go ass to mouth. She was not very happy with me and was equally upset this morning. What do I do to make her happy again?

 

[WabashFalcon]

Dear Stalking Eagle, In the heat of the moment last night I did something with my girlfriend that I have never done before.......I.....um.....well I tried to go ass to mouth. She was not very happy with me and was equally upset this morning. What do I do to make her happy again?

Mouth to ass.... def.

And I would have loved to see the look on her face. I would do terrible, TERRIBLE things to have my fiance open up the back door. So far... no avail...

 

[no.1IrishFan]

Mouth to ass.... def.

And I would have loved to see the look on her face. I would do terrible, TERRIBLE things to have my fiance open up the back door. So far... no avail...

It took her a very long time before she would do it. She was hammered one night and finally let me do it, after that she she realized it wasn't as bad as she thought.

You might want to try the old "oops I slipped" as a way to get it done. I've heard that works sometimes.

Whatever you gotta do buddy don't give up the good fight....it will happen eventually and when it does......

 

[IrishAlum1997]

It took her a very long time before she would do it. She was hammered one night and finally let me do it, after that she she realized it wasn't as bad as she thought.

You might want to try the old "oops I slipped" as a way to get it done. I've heard that works sometimes.

Whatever you gotta do buddy don't give up the good fight....it will happen eventually and when it does......

I started with a pinky finger in the heat of passion....we call it 'tickle tickle.' We moved up to 'just the tip,' and now it's on like Donkey Kong. It's all about conditioning.

 

[WabashFalcon]

Red Banana dancing... considence? I think not.

 

[NeuteredDoomer]

Red Banana dancing... considence? I think not.

Friggen lol

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

Dear Stalking Eagle, In the heat of the moment last night I did something with my girlfriend that I have never done before.......I.....um.....well I tried to go ass to mouth. She was not very happy with me and was equally upset this morning. What do I do to make her happy again?

Sorry it has taken me so long to respond. This is a typical ATM problem men have with women. Do not I repeat do not warm up your ladies barking spider with a pinky unless you snake resembles a pinkie. Use the Thumb - much more girth wont' be such a surprise when you blow up that dirt start with your hog.

Only at last resort do the accidental slip, just prepare to hangon like a rodeo.

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

Wednesday night was awesome - went to a sports bar with a few friends that were in town. we get our food and then at 8 the stippers from downstairs invade and start dancing. Our ladies loved it - strippers were hot and our girls enjoyed themselves. Very random but turned out great.

 

[IrishInFl]

Man, I wish I would have read this post earlier! Oh I'll give you regular updates on fun nights.

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

Man, I wish I would have read this post earlier! Oh I'll give you regular updates on fun nights.

Can't wait!!!!!!! Can it get any weirder than hiring a stripper for an event and she came with a body guard that was a black midget. F'in crazy man - I laughed in his face.

 

[TDHeysus]

Can't wait!!!!!!! Can it get any weirder than hiring a stripper for an event and she came with a body guard that was a black midget. F'in crazy man - I laughed in his face.

You could have hired a stripper that came with a pack of freshly bacon-rubbed chihuahuas.

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

You could have hired a stripper that came with a pack of freshly bacon-rubbed chihuahuas.

I like the way you think, I may do that for saturday night

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

I have an itchy butt today - any ideas?

 

[GO IRISH!!!]

Stop sitting on NeuteredDoomer, for starters!

 

[NeuteredDoomer]

Don't blame me. Blame the saddle.

 

[IrishInFl]

Sweet. I finally have a recent story wirth writing about.

So I went to the bar and met with the gang. Come the end of the night, our friend, who we call Frank the Tank, was making out with some chick in her truck. Gene thought that it would be a good idea to ask the owner to hose them down... so he did. The window was open and it sprayed them right in the face. Problem was that Frank was so drunk that instead of rolling the window down, he opened the door. So the whole truck got soaked, and the two went sliding out of the truck. It was the funniest thing in the history of mankind.

BTW, apparently I am now a member of a Old School (the movie) type fraternity. Thanks Gene!

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

Who wants to get WEIRD with me tonight? :swordfigh

 

[The Polish Irishman]

I once went deep sea fishing in Marco Island, FL and we asked the Captain if he had any good fishing stories and he said "No, but once I screwed a midget."

A strange turn in the conversation.

Then we asked after he finished his story about screwing the midget and how he would spin her, "what would happen if you were to wrestle a manatee?' He said, "I would not stick my dick in its mouth, if that is what you are asking."

That was an interesting day.

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

I once went deep sea fishing in Marco Island, FL and we asked the Captain if he had any good fishing stories and he said "No, but once I screwed a midget."

A strange turn in the conversation.

Then we asked after he finished his story about screwing the midget and how he would spin her, "what would happen if you were to wrestle a manatee?' He said, "I would not stick my dick in its mouth, if that is what you are asking."

That was an interesting day.

What do you think it would feel like poking your hog in a whales blow hole. I bet that hole is real tight. Whale blubber would be great lube also.

 

[NeuteredDoomer]

What do you think it would feel like poking your hog in a whales blow hole...

It would feel like an elf. Oh wait. What are we talking about?

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

It would feel like an elf. Oh wait. What are we talking about?

Are you sure I always found elves feel more like sand paper - I would guess it would feel more like a 3 some with pink flamingos. If no one has ever participated in an event like this it is amazing. The way those flamingos bend their knees in the opposite direction just got me so hard.

 

[NeuteredDoomer]

Have you tried the veal?

 

[WabashFalcon]

Have you tried the veal?

Not as good as the venison...

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

Not as good as the venison...

I <3 meat curtains

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

Lets all get ice cream paint jobs for the season HOllarZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

Now that we have had some time to recover from a shitty football season who wants to join me in jerking off into a bacon roll?

 

[Stalking_Eagle]

Does no one want to hangout with me anymore?