The Alabama joke thread - Irish Envy

**brandonnash** · 12-06-2012, 06:05 PM

All in good fun. Everyone knows they have good football jokes. Now let's hear them. I'll start.

How do you get an Alabama grad off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.

A terrorist from Alabama was arrested after trying to blow up a bus containing Notre Dame fans. He was unsuccessful after burning his lips on the tail pipe.

Do you know why they only have drivers ed 3 days a week in Alabama? They have to use the mule the other 2 days for sex ed.

I heard Alabama university's library burned down. All 3 books were lost. And 2 of them had not even been colored in.

Rack Em · 12-06-2012, 06:15 PM

Crimson Tide fans like Nickelback

Whiskeyjack · 12-06-2012, 06:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brandonnash

All in good fun. Everyone knows they have good football jokes. Now let's hear them. I'll start.

His do you get an Alabama grad off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.

A terrorist from Alabama was arrested after trying to blow up a bus containing Notre Dame fans. He was unsuccessful after burning his lips on the tail pipe.

Do you know why they only have drivers ed 3 days a week in Alabama? They have to use the mule the other 2 days for sex ed.

I heard Alabama university's library burned down. All 3 books were lost. And 2 of them had not even been colored in.

Most of these are old jokes that get recycled by every college fanbase against their rivals. Note some of the "gems" on this anti-ND joke site.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rack Em

Crimson Tide fans like Nickelback

Now them's fightin' werds.

**GO IRISH!!!** · 12-06-2012, 06:36 PM

Q: How do you know when your staying in a Alabama hotel?
A: When you call the front desk and say "I've gotta leak in my sink", and the person at the front desk says "go ahead."

**dylan020** · 12-06-2012, 06:39 PM

What do Alabama fans and maggots have in common?

They both live off dead Bear for 50 years...

**IrishSteelhead** · 12-06-2012, 07:02 PM

How is an outhouse different than an Alabama cheerleader?

The hole is smaller, and it smells better.

How do you stop an Alabama fan from smiling?

Hit him in the face with an axe.

Why don't they put ice in drinks at Tuscaloosa?

The guy with the recipe graduated.

Did you hear Nick Saban is running for sheriff?

He wanted to be closer to his players.

What do you have when you get a Bama fan with chew-spit dribbling out of both sides of his mouth?

A well-balanced trailer.

Why do Bama girls wear panties?

To keep their ankles warm.

What does the average Bama fan get on his SATs?

Copenhagen.

How many UA freshmen does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. That is a junior level course.

What do you call a Bama fan in a suit and clip-on tie?

The defendant.

NDinFL · 12-06-2012, 07:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IrishSteelhead

How is an outhouse different than an Alabama cheerleader?

The hole is smaller, and it smells better.

12-06-2012, 06:05 PM	#1 (permalink)
brandonnash Walk-On Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Murfreesboro, TN Posts: 213 Cash: 18,915.85 Bank: 0.00 Total Bankroll: 18,915.85 Donate	The Alabama joke thread All in good fun. Everyone knows they have good football jokes. Now let's hear them. I'll start. How do you get an Alabama grad off your porch? Pay him for the pizza. A terrorist from Alabama was arrested after trying to blow up a bus containing Notre Dame fans. He was unsuccessful after burning his lips on the tail pipe. Do you know why they only have drivers ed 3 days a week in Alabama? They have to use the mule the other 2 days for sex ed. I heard Alabama university's library burned down. All 3 books were lost. And 2 of them had not even been colored in. Last edited by brandonnash; 12-06-2012 at 08:11 PM..

12-06-2012, 06:36 PM	#4 (permalink)
GO IRISH!!! Wait...what? Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Orange County, CA Posts: 3,105 Cash: 510,364.39 Bank: 5,565,858,953.40 Total Bankroll: 5,566,369,317.80 Donate	Q: How do you know when your staying in a Alabama hotel? A: When you call the front desk and say "I've gotta leak in my sink", and the person at the front desk says "go ahead." __________________ "I prefer dangerous freedom to peaceful slavery." - Thomas Jefferson

12-06-2012, 06:39 PM	#5 (permalink)
dylan020 the next 007 Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Bama Posts: 500 Cash: 2,180.83 Bank: 9,420.56 Total Bankroll: 11,601.39 Donate	What do Alabama fans and maggots have in common? They both live off dead Bear for 50 years... __________________ It's up to us to show them what we've got. Let's get down to business and carry the mail~Knute Rockne

12-06-2012, 07:02 PM	#6 (permalink)
IrishSteelhead All Flair, No Substance Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Indianapolis, IN Posts: 2,631 Cash: 2,882,909.96 Bank: 799,156,291.37 Total Bankroll: 802,039,201.33 Donate	How is an outhouse different than an Alabama cheerleader? The hole is smaller, and it smells better. How do you stop an Alabama fan from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe. Why don't they put ice in drinks at Tuscaloosa? The guy with the recipe graduated. Did you hear Nick Saban is running for sheriff? He wanted to be closer to his players. What do you have when you get a Bama fan with chew-spit dribbling out of both sides of his mouth? A well-balanced trailer. Why do Bama girls wear panties? To keep their ankles warm. What does the average Bama fan get on his SATs? Copenhagen. How many UA freshmen does it take to change a lightbulb? None. That is a junior level course. What do you call a Bama fan in a suit and clip-on tie? The defendant. __________________ Last edited by NDinL.A.; 12-07-2012 at 07:34 AM.. Reason: merged

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12-06-2012, 06:15 PM	#2 (permalink)
Rack Em Daddy Likes Join Date: Aug 2010 Posts: 2,251 Cash: 1,035.13 Bank: 111,287,699.45 Total Bankroll: 111,288,734.58 Donate	Crimson Tide fans like Nickelback

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